What Keeps us From Hearing From God?

Most people that profess to be Christian, or following Jesus Christ, have a desire to hear from God. Many would say they don’t hear from God, or that he never speaks to them. I firmly believe that God speaks to us on a regular basis. I also believe there are some things that keep us from hearing from God.

  • Pride – We don’t think we need God. We don’t want to bother God, or we think we can handle most things on our own.
  • Self-Focus – When you’re self absorbed, the world revolves around you and your problems, circumstances and issues. When we think more about ourselves than others or God it’s difficult to hear anything else.
  • An un-surrendered will & life – This is huge. When there are things in our life that we have not surrendered fully to God, they have influence and control in our lives. It ties in with the pride and self-focus we just talked about. To do this it means completely trusting God with everything you have.
  • Not believing God will speak to us – Some people just don’t believe God speaks anymore. Maybe some through Scripture, but nothing beyond that. That unbelief will block you from hearing from God.
  • Maybe we just don’t know how to hear from God – Some people just don’t know how to even start hearing from God.
  • Unforgiveness or bitterness – When we don’t forgive others and forgive ourselves it can block us from really hearing from God. That root starts to grow and builds negative emotions that distort and deflect much of what God is trying to speak to us.
  • A non-repentant heart toward God – When we are not repenting from our sins, and being vulnerable and honest with God, it keeps us from hearing from Him.
  • Simply too busy – The busyness of life is one of the biggest culprits to us not hearing from God. There are so many things distracting us from God.

A great place to start when wanting to hear from God is to start praying. Spend regular time praying, which is talking to God and listening to God. Prayer is two way communications. The more time you are spending in prayer, the more likely you will hear from God. However, the most important part of prayer is listening.

To listen to God, you also need to remove the many distractions around you. You need to find a place, and time where you can focus completely on God. Maybe it’s a walk in the woods, or a walking path. Maybe it’s in your closet, or a quiet room. Find a place where you’re not distracted and start listening.

God wants to speak to you because He loves you, you are one of his children. In your time with God ask Him some questions. Prayerfully ask the question and then wait. As thoughts come to your mind write them down. Those thoughts are usually from God.

Here is are some examples questions that I recently did in my time with God:

  • Heavenly Father what do you want me to know in my life right now? After waiting a few minutes this is what came to my mind and I wrote it down: “That I am bigger than anything you will ever face. That I love you more than all of creation and that you are doing what I want you to do right now in your life.”
  • Lord Jesus, how do you care for me? Please show me how you love me. “Chad, I have provided for all your needs and most of your wants, I’ve protected you from things you don’t even know about. I’ve brought certain people into your life to support, encourage and care for you. I am always with you and I’ve given you strength and wisdom for the struggles of your life. “
  • Father God, what do you want me to know about how I am to mentor the people you bring into my life? “Be more authentic and pour more of yourself into these men. Share your story with them and show them how you connect with me, how you work on your relationships – But to do that well, you need to be more consistent in your time with me. Listen more & I’ll tell you more, you will be amazed at what happens when you listen more in our prayer times. “

When you ask good questions and listen carefully, God does speak. The more you do this, the more you start to be even more clear about God’s voice, verses your own voice. Practicing silence and solitude is a good step into this. Reading Scripture is vital, because that is how you know it’s God’s voice and not just your own voice.

God also speaks through other people, so pay attention when someone is praying for you or giving you counsel. Again if you are reading God’s word you can know if what they are telling you lines up with God’s word or not.

So if you are longing to hear from God, start by getting alone with no distractions and pray, but be sure to listen. Have a journal and pen ready to write down what is coming to your mind. If you are stuck, start reading Scripture and see what jumps out at you, highlight it or write it down in your journal. Stay consistent and persistent and see what God does.

Wisdom for Difficult Times

James 1:2-5

“My friends, consider yourselves fortunate when all kinds of trials come your way, for you know that when your faith succeeds in facing such trials, the result is the ability to endure. Make sure that your endurance carries you all the way without failing, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. But if any of you lack wisdom, you should pray to God, who will give it to you; because God gives generously and graciously to all.”

What do you do when hardships hit you? Who do you talk to when life takes a turn for the worse? What do you do when people attack you? Who do you turn to when things get out of control?

Some people go to social media for information. Some people turn to the news, or to government leaders. Some people turn to their friends or parents or a trusted mentor. And some people turn to God.

Turning to God is the first and best thing we can all do in difficult times. I think we can also talk to people we trust to process and gain insight into what is best. But talking to God should always come first. Asking for help, for wisdom and discernment to know what is right and what is not. I often ask God for spiritual strength to keep going, or for God to bring the right people into my life to give me direction or encouragement.

James tells us that we should be grateful for hardships and trials, as it will make us better, it will give us wisdom and valuable experience, building our endurance. However we only gain wisdom, and our character is only strengthened, if we handle those adversities in the right way. When we learn from our failures, and gain deeper understanding about who God is, who we are, and what our purpose in life is, then we gain true wisdom.

Wisdom cannot be purchased, but wisdom can be developed. Reading God’s word and praying to God, gives us the right perspectives when dealing with difficult times. That is why it is so critical to be reading God’s word and praying during the hard times of our lives. Going to church and listening to messages from Biblically based leaders can give you new insights, wisdom and encouragement.

Good leaders will point people to Jesus, and the incredible transformation that comes from a relationship with Him. When spiritual growth and personal growth come together there is real transformation.

In these days of political unrest, division, hatred, and deception, we need to understand that this is not new, there have been and always will be difficult, trying times in this world. However, if you have a personal relationship with Jesus, it changes your perspective. Why? because now you know where you will spend eternity. Fear is taken over by love, and we experience a freedom like nothing else.

So use common sense and be wise in difficult times, but also look to God for your wisdom, courage and strength. Talk to Him regularly, read what He has to say, then listen and obey.

Seven Things I’ve Learned about Great Leadership

As I reflect on being a leader over the last 30 years, it’s been a process of building, learning and growing. I still believe that everything rises and falls on leadership. The times that I have not lead well, things began to slip whether at work or at home. When I’ve led well progress was made and change happened, in me and others. I’ve learned so much and still have a lot to learn and improve on, but I would like to share some of what I believe about leadership.

I’d like to share seven thoughts about leadership, and what great leaders do.

  1. Great leaders develop people – People development should be a daily event, integrated into every interaction and conversation. As a leader you are constantly evaluating things and people around you. Are the right people in the right position, who needs more attention, what resources are needed to help them grow, are our systems encouraging growth, learning and improvement. Encouragement is a big part of developing people, building up their self-confidence, encouraging risk taking and constant improvement. Leaders need to mentor, coach and counsel the people they lead. The only way to do that is by getting to know them, their personalities, what motivates them, what their strengths and weaknesses are, and what they are passionate about.
  2. Great leaders cast vision – Vision leaks and it’s the leaders responsibility to keep filling people up with the vision. If there is no vision the organization, the family, the relationship will decline. To cast vision you must be clear about what the vision really is. The vision can’t be constantly changing. Dripping the vision consistently, rewarding people that get it and living it out as an example.
  3. Great leaders build trust – Trust is built over time by being consistent, doing what you say, listening, and being humble. Leaders take responsibility for when things go wrong and they generously pass around praise when things go right. Trust building also comes from good decisions, asking for peoples input, and doing what is best for your company, your family or the relationship. It also makes a huge difference to admit when you were wrong and to ask for forgiveness when you make a mistake. Trust takes a long time to build, but can be lost very quickly with one bad decision or mistake. What helps me is to have some other leaders around me that know me and hold me accountable, pray for me and encourage me.
  4. Great leaders make the tough calls – Tough calls can bring on criticism, resistance and complaints. Leaders that are willing to make difficult decisions do that because of the vision, the values, and the culture they are passionate about. Anything that derails that or distracts from that, needs to be changed or eliminated. The ability to make the tough calls comes from years of experience, failure and victories. It’s also vital to have some trusted advisors or mentors that can help you when you are facing a tough decision.
  5. Great leaders serve – Serving the people around you is one of the primary functions of a leader. What I mean by that is good leaders look for ways to make things better for their people. What resources are needed? What information is needed? What questions need to be asked? Who needs to rest or slow down? Who needs to be challenged more? The best way to do this is by meeting with your people, asking questions, getting to know them better, and really caring about them. Great leaders serve!
  6. Great leaders inspire – Inspiration comes from a compelling vision, but it also comes from being a good example. Leaders that live out what they say and lead by example inspire others to do the same. Leaders that take risks, learn through failure, and lead with integrity inspire people and give people the courage to do the same. Inspiration comes from the words leaders use and the actions they take.
  7. Great leaders are humble – Humility is the key to great leadership. Thinking about what is best for others and not yourself. Being open to new ideas or other people’s opinions. Admitting when you make a mistake, and owning bad decisions. Being humble does not mean you are weak, it really means you are strong and confident. It means you are not afraid to surround yourself with people more talented than you are. Leaders that have the combination of humility and persistence are the leaders people want to follow.

There is so much more to leadership, but if you work on just a few of these things you can grow as a leader. If you are struggling as a leader, keep going, it’s in the struggling that you become the leader God created you to be.

The last thing I will say about great leadership is that faith in Jesus Christ has been a game changer for me. Jesus is the best leader this world has ever seen. Simply studying and following the life of Jesus will make you a better leader. Putting your faith and trust in him changes your eternal destiny. He is all seven of those things in perfection, and so much more.

IS THE BIBLE TRUE?

There are many opinions about whether the Bible is true or not. Some people think it’s partly true. Other people think many of the stories in it are a myth. Read the following verses and identify where the Bible came from and how we got it?

 2 Timothy 3:16: “All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.” NLT

2 Peter 1:20-21: “Above all, you must realize that no prophecy in Scripture ever came from the prophet’s own understanding, or from human initiative. No, those prophets were moved by the Holy Spirit, and they spoke from God.” NLT

The Bible claims to be inspired. Inspired or “God-breathed” means that God spoke through the writers of the Bible to communicate absolute truth to us. Although the exact method is unknown, the entire Bible is God’s thoughts given to us through people. Because the Bible came from God, you can be certain it’s true.

WHY SHOULD I READ THE BIBLE?

A lot of people say the Bible is outdated or irrelevant. Yet many people have never read an entire chapter of the Bible. Read the following list of subjects. If you think the subject is outdated, mark it with an “I” for irrelevant. If the subject is relevant today, mark it with an “R” for relevant.

     _  marriage     _    addictions _ forgiving others     _    money management     _    dating

  _    handling stress     _    family relationships      _   time management

It may surprise you that each of these subjects is addressed in the Bible. The more you read the Bible, the more insight you will find regarding the issues and challenges you’re facing.

Many items we purchase come with an expiration date. You can be certain you won’t find an expiration date on your Bible! Everything in the Bible is relevant for us today and throughout our lives.

When most of us hear the word study it produces a negative connotation. However, when we study something, we learn and discover facts about it. Studying the Bible involves a process of learning that includes observation, interpretation, and application. Read the following verses and identify what you observe, can interpret, or apply? 

Psalm 1:1-3

CONCLUSION

Getting to know the Bible is more than just reading words on a page or learning facts about a subject. The Bible reveals the truth about Jesus Christ.  So as we get to know the Bible, we’re really getting to know Jesus.

Identity Crisis

In our world today there is a lot of confusion about identity. Many are putting their identity in sexual orientation, gender, political beliefs or even a sports team. There is also massive confusion about who God is and who Jesus Christ is. Religious beliefs and teachings can further confuse people.

As a follower of Jesus Christ, and a believer in Jesus Christ, my identity is in Him. If you are also a believer then your identity should also be in Christ. We are now children of God, part of the family, and God is central in everything we think, say and do.

Most Christ followers need reminded from time to time of who they are in Christ. I often will read through things that help me to remember who I am. I want to share some of the things that have helped me over the years. I hope this is helpful to you as well.

The Apostle Paul shares our lofty position in Christ when he wrote, “To the saints who are in Ephesus, and are faithful in Christ Jesus” (Ephesians. 1:1). As you read this, put your name in the following:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed (name) in Christ with every spiritual blessings in the heavenly places, even as He chose (name) in Him before the foundation of the world, that (name) should be holy and blameless before Him. In love He predestined (name) for adoption through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His will, to the praise of His glorious grace, with which He has blessed (name) in the Beloved. In Him (name) has redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace, which He lavished upon (name) . . . In Him (name) has obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His will . . . In Him (name) also, when (name) heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in Him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of (name) inheritance until (name) acquires possession of it (Eph. 1:3-14).

Understanding your identity in Christ is absolutely essential to your success at living the victorious Christian life! Slowly read through the following list, maybe even read it out loud. Let these statements sink deep into your soul. Look up the Scriptures and keep drinking it in.

I am accepted . . . 

John 1:12 I am God’s child.

John 15:15 I am Christ’s friend.

Rom. 5:1 I have been justified.

1 Cor. 6:17 I am united with the Lord, and I am one spirit with Him.

1 Cor. 6:19-20 I have been bought with a price. I belong to God.

1 Cor. 12:27 I am a member of Christ’s body.

Eph. 1:1 I am a saint.

Eph. 1:5 I have been adopted as God’s child.

Eph. 2:18 I have direct access to God through the Holy Spirit.

Col. 1:14 I have been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins.

Col. 2:10 I am complete in Christ.

I am secure . . . 

Rom.  8:1-2 I am free forever from condemnation.

Rom. 8:28 I am assured that all things work together for good.

Rom. 8:31-34 I am free from any condemning charges against me.

Rom. 8:35-39 I cannot be separated from the love of God.

2 Cor. 1:21-22 I have been established, anointed, and sealed by God.

Col. 3:3 I am hidden with Christ in God.

Phil. 1:6 I am confident that the good work God has begun in me will 

be perfected.

Phil. 3:20 I am a citizen of heaven.

2 Tim. 1:7 I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a 

sound mind.

Heb. 4:16 I can find grace and mercy in time of need.

1 John 5:18 I am born of God, and the evil one cannot touch me.

I am significant . . .

Matt. 5:13-14 I am the salt and light of the earth.

John 15:1,5 I am a branch of the true vine, a channel of His life.

John 15:16 I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit.

Acts 1:8 I am a personal witness of Christ’s.

1 Cor. 3:16 I am God’s temple.

2 Cor. 5:17-21 I am a minister of reconciliation for God.

2 Cor. 6:1 I am God’s coworker (1 Cor. 3:9).

Eph. 2:6 I am seated with Christ in the heavenly realm.

Eph. 2:10 I am God’s workmanship.

Eph. 3:12 I may approach God with freedom and confidence.

Phil. 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!

(From Living Free in Christ by Dr. Neil Anderson)

The more you reaffirm who you are in Christ, the more your behavior will begin to reflect your true identity!”
(From Victory Over the Darkness by Dr. Neil Anderson)

Obey Like Jesus

If ever there was a word that makes us cringe, it would be obedience. For a lot of folks, obedience has a negative connotation. Maybe it reminds you of your failures, your inability to measure up to some standard. Maybe it reminds you of someone in your past (a parent, or a pastor) who used religion to manipulate you.

As Parents you want your children to “obey” you. Not because they are afraid of you, but because they trust you. Lots of kids rebel against authority, especially their parents. They experiment on how far they can push it. They want to go their own way, even if you as the parent know better. Honestly many adults are also rebelling, doing their own thing and not obeying authority figures, especially God.

When it comes to obeying someone, it’s a lot easier to obey someone you trust and feel loved by. However, not everyone who insists on obedience does so out of love for us. Some people throw this word around like a hand grenade, and do a lot of damage in the name of God. Obedience is a power word. Usually when someone insists on our obedience it’s a “red flag.” Some people use this word to conceal their ambitions, hidden agenda, and selfishness. Emotionally abusive people love to use this word as they tread all over us like a doormat.

From a Biblical perspective, we’re always living in obedience to someone, or something. And so our obedience can be directed toward God, or it can be dislocated away from God.

“Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness?” Romans 6:16

We can be mastered by sin just as readily as anything. So we obey our addictions. We obey our lusts. We obey our appetite for caffeine, alcohol, sugars, carbs.  We obey our materialistic impulses–the idol of bigger, better, faster, newer, shinier. We obey our tech impulses, new and better devices. Few masters are more ruthless than our desires.

At first our lusts isolate us from others. We withdrawal to do our thing. Then they demand greater commitment. Time, energy, resources, relationships, life. At first we try to manage them, until they finally consume us, destroying us in the end.

In Mark 7:8 Jesus observes how we “lay aside the commands of God to obey the traditions of men.”

We can identify as a certain denomination instead of a follower of Jesus. We obey the traditions we learned instead of the person we love, Jesus. Instead of serving God, sometimes we can become servants of our religious/political ideologies.

The masses didn’t crucify Jesus because he was the Son of God, or was obeying God. They killed him because he didn’t obey their traditions. In John 12:43 he describes how people “love human praise more than praise from God.” How many times have you felt conviction about some great thing God put on your heart, only to realize that your spouse, a boyfriend/ girlfriend, your kids, a friend was not on board, or disagreed with you? So instead of pressing forward, you relented, and gave in to the pressure. Our need for affirmation, and approval is so strong, we will cave rather than risk the disapproval of others. It’s like a law has been passed: “I have to be liked.” I need a Facebook thumbs up, a Twitter retweet, to have the validation I need in life. Do we obey men, or do we obey God?

Galatians 2:16 says, “…we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we might be made right with God because of our faith in Christ, not because we have obeyed the law. For no one will ever be made right with God by obeying the law” (NLT).

The Bible describes how people believe they are accepted by God by obeying all the laws God has given. So like the Rich Young Ruler, people try to establish their own righteousness before God. Our checklists become a source of pride for us, and they become a sort of litmus test by which we gauge other’s sincerity, spirituality, or faith. “I don’t ever miss church. I read my Bible. I’ve been baptized. I tithe. I volunteer. I go to Bible study. I go on missions trips. I care about orphans, widows, prisoners, the hungry, the sick. . . I, I, I…” Our selective, cherry-picked lists can give us a false sense of confidence before God.

God’s standard is Galatians 3:10, “For all who rely on the works of the law are under a curse, as it is written: “Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the Law.”

Who or what do you most obey? Jesus’ obedience wasn’t oriented around things… it was oriented to Father. Look at how Jesus obeyed. In John 8:28-30 Jesus says, “… I do nothing on My own initiative, but I speak these things as the Father taught Me. “ And He who sent Me is with Me; He has not left Me alone, for I always do the things that are pleasing to Him.”  

Philippians 2:8, “… being found in the appearance as a man, Jesus humbled himself by becoming obedient to death–even death on a cross!” 

To Obey Like Jesus: First, obedience is all about relationship. “Obedience or trusting obedience is God’s love language.” The “heart” of obedience is pleasing the Father in everything–i.e. in all we say and do. He is pleased when we obey because he knows that means we trust him. When we trust God we want to obey God, When we have a relationship with Jesus and are intimate with our Father God we don’t obey out of fear, it’s out of love. 2 John 1:6 says, “And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.” 1 John 5:3, “For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments; and His commandments are not burdensome.”

Second, grace is the basis for our relationship with God. We are saved through faith in Christ alone, by virtue of Christ’s sacrifice, His perfect righteousness, His blood. The best we can do is respond to God’s offer of mercy. We can confess Jesus as Lord. We can repent and turn to God. We can pledge our lives to him in baptism. Ephesians 2:8-9 says, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith–and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God– not by works, so that no one can boast.” Faith in Jesus Christ leads to being born again spiritually. You are a new person and that new person begins to grow in love for Jesus. As that love grows, trust increases and obedience increases.

Third, obedience is God’s prescription for blessing. God’s commands carry a blessing, a promise, a reward. God’s promise to the children of Abraham is that if they obeyed God, it would go well for them, they would live a long life, and receive inheritance. If we sow obedience, we reap God’s very best in our lives. In Luke 11:28 Jesus says, “Blessed are those who hear the word of God and obey it.”  I even noticed in 1 John 3:22 that obedience makes our prayers more powerful. John says, “If our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we keep his commands and do what pleases him.”

Last, obedience is evidence our faith is alive, not dead. James says faith without works is DOA (James 2:17).  1 John 2:5-6 says, “But if anyone obeys his word, love for God is truly made complete in them. This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus lived.”  If our faith is alive, real, vibrant, sincere, it will show itself in how we live. Obedience is the inevitable fruit of saving faith.  In the end, God judges our faith by every word spoken, and every deed done, whether in public or private.

Who will you obey?

Pray Like Jesus

There is one thing can make a difference in everything… and that one thing is your prayer life! When you and I pray powerful things happen, When we pray God listens, he moves, he works, he answers. Sometimes we see it and sometimes we don’t.

Jesus said ask and you shall receive and James wrote in the book of James you have not because you ask not. Prayer is not only powerful in your life, but in a very real sense prayer is prophetic in your life. What I mean is that what you are praying about is a real indicator of what is going to happen in your life. Where God is working and what will happen in the future. It all begins with prayer.

Now Jesus was praying in a certain place, and when he finished, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray, as John taught his disciples.” And he said to them, “When you pray, say: “Father, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come. Give us each day our daily bread, and forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation.”

Praying like Jesus is the source of a power filled life. “Now Jesus was praying in a certain place, and when he finished, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray, as John taught his disciples.” Luke 11:1 ESV. I find it interesting that is what they asked Jesus to teach them. They have seen him do miracles, raise the dead, cast out demons, multiply the loaves and fish, teach with incredible wisdom and draw huge crowds. They didn’t ask him to teach them any of that. They wanted to know how to pray like him.

When Jesus was facing a big decision like who would be his 12 disciples he prayed. “In these days he went out to the mountain to pray, and all night he continued in prayer to God.” Luke 6:12 ESV

Praying like Jesus is the key to seeing God’s will done. “And he said to them, “When you pray, say: “Father, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come.” Luke 11:2 Jesus teaches us to not pray for our kingdom to come or our will to be done. He’s saying no, when we pray we are trusting God knows best, his will is best. God I want your way, your desire, what you think is best in my life or the people I’m praying for.

The hard part of this is that God’s timing is usually not our timing and his ways are not our ways. Often times as we pray God is also doing a work in us, he is shaping us and molding us and changing us. As we get closer to God the way we pray changes as we understand His ways better, and trust Him more.

God knows our motives, he knows our heart and when we are praying for things that are not good for us or maybe even hurtful to others, he knows he has work to do in us. It may be why he is saying no, or not answering your prayers. Keep on Asking – Keep on Seeking – Keep on Knocking! Don’t grow weary. Praying like Jesus means trusting that God will do what is best. Trust that God knows what is best for you and your situation. 

Forgive Like Jesus

How many of you have scars on your body? How many of you have ever felt judged? Maybe for the way you look or something you did in your past, or a decision you made. How many of you like being judged? Nobody raised their hand on that one.

How many of you have been hurt by someone? Maybe you were abused, rejected, made fun of or lied about you. Bullied? Maybe you were betrayed by a friend, or taken advantage of.

Being judged and being hurt can leave emotional scars in our lives. Those wounds stay with us and many times don’t heal right, they get infected and can spread and cause many other issues. Even when they heal properly they can still leave scars that remind us of what happened to us.

When Jesus was cornered and put in a bad situation, He didn’t lash out. Instead, Jesus bent down and wrote with His finger on the ground. He didn’t blurt out an answer. He didn’t get sarcastic. He didn’t get angry, He didn’t run or hide. He basically ignored them. One translation adds, “he acted as though he heard them not.” 

But they keep pressuring Jesus for an answer about the woman caught in adultery. Again look at how Jesus responds. He doesn’t make a long speech, or teach a deep lesson. He made a very simple statement. Jesus said, “Whoever is without sin, cast the first stone.” When every left, she forgave the woman and encouraged her to sin no more.

In Romans 2:1 Paul tells us “Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things.”

To be like Jesus, we must learn to be quick to forgive, not quick to judge, or condemn. Paul tells us that “There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1

When you acknowledge that Jesus is Lord, he is quick to forgive and brings no condemnation or judgment. He wipes the slate clean.

Jesus also teaches us to pray for those who abuse us, in Luke 6:28 — “Bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.” Praying for people we care about is easy. Praying for people we don’t know well is also fairly easy. Praying for someone who hurt us or someone we loved is hard.

The reason Jesus tells us to do this is because He knows that our enemies, those who have hurt us in any way, can only be forgiven with the help of God. Praying for them helps us to break through the pain and see a person. When we pray for those that hurt us it begins that process of spiritual strengthening that is needed to truly forgive a person.

You might start by simply saying be with them, or maybe help them, or do something in their lives. Then you can get to the point where you actually ask God to bless them, make something good happen in their lives. Then maybe even deeper where you start to pray for their salvation, or their healing from whatever hurts they have.

Your prayers for others may or may not change them, but it will always change you. Forgiveness is more about you than the other person. Unforgiveness does a lot of damage in our hearts. It stays inside us right on top to the hurt and that often leads to negative emotions like anger, bitterness, frustration, and even things like depression and anxiety. 

Forgive as you have been forgiven. Jesus quickly forgave you! The moment you put your faith in him, the moment you asked. He is saying we should forgive that way. Forgiveness does not mean you will forget. You can’t just erase those memories and the hurt. But once you are free and healing you don’t think about it as much and eventually it’s not something you think about at all.

Forgiveness is not a feeling it is a choice, on our own we will never feel like forgiving, but with God’s help we can choose to forgive. Choose to give grace, and forgive, and speak the truth in love while not judging people as part of living like Jesus.

Choose a life of Self Giving

I believe life is about growing in our relationship with Jesus Christ. When we do that the rest of our lives find direction, meaning and purpose.

And one of the ways of God that leads us deeper into this kind of relationship is the pathway of self-giving. 

I’m not talking about giving your money, though the happiest and healthiest saints are always the most generous. I’m talking about giving yourself. 

We know from experience and from the Bible that the path of self-giving is the path of greatest joy and growth. It’s not free from risk and pain. But it is the path of greatest joy. 

Paul said in Acts 20:35, “Remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” More happy. More deeply satisfying. More rich and solid. Especially giving yourself.

This is who you are as a Christian. The moment you become a Christian, you are a giver by nature. self-giving is part of your nature, your essence, your identity.

Listen to Jesus: “Whoever drinks of the water that I will give him [that’s what it means to be a Christian] will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (John 4:14). 

That is who you are. You are a spring. You don’t do a spring. You are a spring. Whoever believes in me, Jesus said, “Out of his heart will flow rivers of living water” (John 7:38). That’s who you are. You are a spring. You are a fountain.

And what makes springs and fountains happy and healthy is when they make streams. If you stop them up, they stagnate. If you let them give — if you let them become what they are — they stay clear and healthy and life-giving and happy. 

Let’s turn to 1 Thessalonians 2:1–12.

Seven Ways Paul Gave Himself

Now listen to Paul as he tells us seven ways that he gave them himself. Please, don’t think of this as for someone else. Be encouraged to become what you are in Christ, a fountain, a spring, a giver of yourself.

1. First, Paul took a risk.

Verse 2: “But though we had already suffered and been shamefully treated at Philippi, as you know, we had boldness in our God to declare to you the gospel of God in the midst of much conflict.”

Going to church or going back to church is risky. Many of you have had bad church experiences, you’ve been hurt or disappointed or neglected or even rejected.
Taking the step of going is big. Walking into a new church with all the unknowns, is taking a risk

It’s the same thing getting into a small group or volunteering to serve. It’s risky, you could get hurt again, you could be disappointed again, you might not click or it might not be the right fit.

But that’s what the Gospel is all about – taking a risk, living and giving our lives to others. Loving and serving and growing. You can’t do that if you live an isolated, careful life. 

Sometimes we need to step out of our comfort zones and take a risk

2. Paul lived with integrity.

Verse 3: “For our appeal does not spring from error or impurity or any attempt to deceive.”

He gave them the truth and kept himself pure (that word for “impurity” is regularly used by Paul for sexual sin). He wasn’t doing this to find an inappropriate relationship.

He’s saying look guys our motives for helping you, for sharing the Gospel with you was from a heart of integrity. Integrity is not living perfect, but it’s being quick to admit your failures, your mistakes, asking for forgiveness – It’s being open, honest and of good character.

Our desire should be to live lives of integrity so that we can be a positive helpful influence on others.

We are not perfect, but we do have Christ, we do have the Holy Spirit.

3. Paul was not a People Pleaser.

Verse 4: “We speak, not to please man, but to please God who tests our hearts.” Verse 6: “Nor did we seek glory from people, whether from you or from others.”

People-pleasing makes people into phonies or pretenders. It usually means they are deeply insecure. 

What they want most is your approval. And so they are not real. They will do or say anything to make you happy, to avoid conflict or get you to like them

We all have some of these tendencies of wanting people to like us or to get their approval. That’s not wrong, it’s just should not be our primary motivator for doing things..

That is not giving yourselves. You never really know the real person. Paul will have nothing to do with that. He was all about pleasing God – His focus was on listening to God, obeying God, Sharing the good news about Jesus.

Relax in Jesus, and be who you are — warts, wrinkles, scars, and all.

4. Paul was Honest & Humble.

Verse 5: “For we never came with words of flattery, as you know, nor with a pretext for greed — God is witness.”

Flattery is using language not for the sake of truth, but for the sake of manipulation. You want something. 

In this case, Paul was being accused of buttering them up as a way to get money. They say he wanted their money, not their souls. And he says, “you and God know that is not true.”

We should live our lives the same way, not trying to manipulate people to get what we want, to get our way, to make more money.

We should not go to church or get into a small group to better our financial position or our status or to take advantage of someone else’s generosity, but to give ourselves.

Listen to verse 9: “For you remember, brothers, our labor and toil: we worked night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you.” He was not after their money. He was after their hearts for their good, he wanted them to have a relationship with Jesus. 

He was there to give them himself. When you give yourself, you don’t flatter, and you don’t position yourself for money, and you don’t expect to be served. You are there to give. That’s who you are in Christ — a giver.

That should be our attitude when you go to church, when we join a small group, when we volunteer to serve. Not what can I get, but what can I give.

5. Paul Cared Deeply for others.

Verse 6–8: We could have made demands as apostles of Christ. But we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother taking care of her own children. So, being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves, because you had become very dear to us.

He exchanged a relationship of power for a relationship of affection. This is a very vulnerable thing for a leader to do, or anyone really. 

Caring about people and caring for people is part of our calling to give ourselves to each other. 

Don’t ever think you are above this. Don’t ever think you are too sophisticated or too self-sufficient, or too cool to give yourself like this — showing tender affection like a mother with her children.

Who can you show kindness to? Where can you build meaningful relationships that lead to care and friendship.

For some of you it starts in your homes, with your spouse or with your family. But don’t stop there. You can be a part of a group, serve on a team, be a mentor or pray for people and encourage people that are hurting or struggling.

Ask God to change your heart, to help you care deeply about other people and how you can love and serve others.

6. Paul treated people right.

Verse 10: “You are witnesses, and God also, how holy and righteous and blameless was our conduct toward you believers.”

He is not saying he was sinless. What this means is: We honored God, we treated people right, and we gave no one a legitimate reason to blame us for our behavior

He was above reproach. What a beautiful thing — what a compelling thing — when we can be real and be good. He walked in integrity.

Paul was open, vulnerable and real. There was nothing fake about him. He was genuine, he treated people with respect, love and care. He was full of truth and grace, which made it hard for people to find fault in him or accuse him of anything shady.

7. Paul was an Encourager

Verses 11–12: “For you know how, like a father with his children, we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God, who calls you into his own kingdom and glory.”

And the legacy was not the memory of himself, but the kingdom and the glory of God.

Paul was a great encourager, just like a father encourages his children, so we can be known as an encourager, instead of a complainer.

Who can you encourage? Write a note, send  a text, say a prayer, visit, call.

Bottom Line: You Have Something to Give, Choose a life of giving Yourself.

Six Ways to Handle Stress

We all experience stress every day. Some days are much worse than others. I’ve recently experienced some stress related to travel that made me think about how to handle and manage the stress we face every day. First our flight got cancelled, then our new flight was delayed 3 hours, which caused us to miss our connecting flight. You probably got stressed out just reading that.

When stress builds up over time it can wear us down, and take a toll on us physically, emotionally and spiritually. When we are worn down we often will do and say things that we can regret later.

Stress is often relatively short-term, and is often caused by feeling that work or home life is out of control. When both of those are out of control the stress feels extra heavy.

Maybe you have a heavy work week with several big projects, causing you to work extra hours, and maybe pushing to meet a tight deadline. You may also be experiencing tension at home with a close relationship, or have some financial pressure that has been building.

Most of the time we have high stress days or weeks, and then days or weeks of lower stress. It’s when those stress days move into months and years that it can take a toll on us to the breaking point.

Prolonged stress can lead to burnout. When you start reaching the point of burnout, your work starts to not seem as meaningful, and there is often a disconnect between what you are doing and what you want to do. You start to feel like you’re just going through the motions, and you can become cynical, critical and adversarial. You are probably experiencing regular mental and physical exhaustion, and you’re finding it hard to rest.

So what can we do to manage stress. First it’s important to recognize the unhealthy ways that we are dealing with stress. Many people will self medicate by drinking, smoking, eating, shopping, binging on something. I’ve been binging on Law & Order SVU, Criminal Minds and Chicago PD.

Next you can start working on healthy ways to deal with stress. Here are just a few that help me:

  1. Exercise/Eat Healthy/Sleep – I put those together because those are all physical things we can do to help with our stress. Those three things, when done in a healthy way, can reduce stress and make you stronger physically and emotionally. You become more resilient and can bounce back faster.
  2. Prayer/Meditation/Worship – I put those three together because those are spiritual things you can do to reduce stress in a big way. I believe in and follow Jesus, and when I spend more time with Him, I feel so much better and less stressed. I also include reading my Bible and doing daily devotions to help prepare me everyday for the stress that is coming. Block off extra time when stress is high for Quiet time with God. Listen to worship music, and sing along. Write in a journal and list everything you’re grateful for. Caring for yourself spiritually builds internal strength, and allows God to make changes in you and through you.
  3. Plan for and take breaks during the day, during the week, and during the month. – Every day take short refreshment breaks. It could be a 10 minute walk around the office, going and getting a drink of water, standing in the sunshine for a few minutes or taking 5 minutes to pray. Each week you should have a day of rest, where you are not working, but resting, reading, exercising, sleeping, spending time with loved ones. Every month you should plan a little extra time for self care, spiritual care or relational care. Plan those and put them on your calendar.
  4. Have honest conversations – Talk to your leader if you’re able to, about the stress you are feeling. Ask for clear expectations, and help in prioritizing your work. Also ask your leader if you have the right goals, and if they should be adjusted. If you don’t have any goals for work or home, work on setting a few and then talk with your boss or spouse. If you’re in a toxic environment have the courage to talk about that, and offer ways that you can help make it better.
  5. Learn the art of saying no, and asking for help – This can be hard, but is a great way to reduce stress. You can say no and still be kind and helpful. It’s also wise to ask for help. If you are unsure about something, or don’t know how to do it, ask for help or clarity. Good leaders appreciate when you ask questions, and you can avoid a lot of stress and miscommunication when you ask good questions. This works at home as well.
  6. Finally talk to a counselor, mentor or pastor – This can help to dig a little deeper and find out if there are things that are causing stress that are under the surface, or buried inside you. This doesn’t mean you are weak, it actually takes courage and strength to go get help, and it will reduce your stress in the long run.

Philippians 4:6-7 is very helpful when it comes to stress. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Psalm 55:22 says “Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you”

Jesus also told his disciples to “come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.” When they had been overworked and overwhelmed Jesus encouraged them to get away and rest. That’s great advice for us today.