Emotional Wounds

Most people have heard the saying that “time heals all wounds.” That simply is not true, especially for emotional wounds. As a pastor I often talk with people who are still carrying hurts from twenty to thirty years ago. The truth is, time usually makes the wound worse. When a wound is left untended it quickly becomes infected and can spread throughout the entire body. It is the same with an emotional wound. When that wound is buried and hidden the infection starts and it grows over time. This infection causes many other symptoms and problems.

Many times we try to fix the outward symptoms of anger, bitterness, guilt, jealousy, addictions, anxiety, depression and bad relationships. If you focus on these outward symptoms you never heal the wound. You may be able to mask them for a while, but they usually will return. Time only extends the pain if the original wound is not dealt with.

So, how do you deal with those wounds? On your own you cannot heal those wounds. Only Jesus Christ can heal those wounds. You will also need the help of other people as you work through the pain and open up the wound and pray for God’s healing touch. This may mean getting some professional help through counseling, spiritual help through a pastor or Christian counselor and relational help through a small group of friends to hold you accountable and encourage you.

I have helped numerous people work through steps to finding freedom from the pain of an old wound or wounds. Only the truth can set you free. Truth is the person of Jesus Christ, and only an encounter with Him can heal the deep wounds of your past.

Most of us have believed so many lies throughout our lives that we do not really know who God is or what He is like. These lies shape who we think we are, and what we think about God. With a wrong view of who God is, and who we are, it is easy to stay stuck in the feelings of hopelessness and feeling helpless.

I want to encourage you to take that first step toward freedom by facing your fears and asking Jesus to touch that wound. You may need to seek someone to help you along the way. Pray and ask God to give you direction for the help you need. God does not want you to live in bondage, but to be free and victorious.

King David was experiencing a great deal of opposition and rejection when, while hiding in a desert cave, he wrote Psalm 142. Start like David did and cry out to the Lord. God cares about you and wants you to be whole, not broken.

Dancing

I was watching Dancing With the Stars this week. I had not watched it for the last couple of seasons, but for some reason I was hooked as I watched the three couples perform. It was amazing to me how good these non-professional dancers were. I realize they are matched with a Pro, but they knew their stuff.

As I watched this it hit me that learning to dance is much like learning how to have good relationships with other people. In marriage especially, learning to dance is important. I am not talking about actual dancing, although that could be really good for your marriage. Just doing something together is often a good first step. What I am talking about is learning new dance steps for your relationship.

You see each of us has some dance steps we have learned from other people growing up about how relationships or marriages should work. We develop certain attitudes, expectations and mindsets on our relationships.

Most of these dance steps are flawed or outright wrong, and so we stumble along trying to dance with someone instead we step on each others toes and sometimes even fall down. Many times instead of learning new better dance steps we just try harder with to old ones and make it worse.

I am officiating a wedding on Saturday and I will be sharing some new dance steps for this couple to work on as they start a new life together. I want to share one of those steps.

The first dance step is to from Proverbs 12:18 “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing”. Words are powerful and dangerous. Your words can hurt, tear down and destroy a relationship, but your words can also encourage, lift up and bring life to your relationship. The first dance step is to choose your words wisely. Words like; please, thank you, I am proud of you, you did a great job, you look amazing, I love you, your the best and on and on.

Sincere words of encouragement bring healing to a relationship. Start practicing this dance step in all your relationships. It is the beginning of a beautiful dance.