{"id":676,"date":"2011-08-10T13:21:00","date_gmt":"2011-08-10T13:21:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/chadstutzman.net\/?p=676"},"modified":"2011-08-10T13:21:00","modified_gmt":"2011-08-10T13:21:00","slug":"forgiveness-and-an-amish-boy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chadstutzman.com\/?p=676","title":{"rendered":"Forgiveness and an Amish Boy"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Unforgiveness is like cancer, it eats away at our insides and causes all kinds of pain and suffering.\u00a0 We live in a world that is not perfect.\u00a0 People let us down, hurt us, disappoint us and sometimes even intentionally cause physical or emotional damage to our lives.\u00a0 When these things happen to us we always have a choice in how we handle those situations.\u00a0 It really depends on where our heart is at, as to how we handle these difficult times in our lives.\u00a0 If our heart or emotional state is healthy and focused on our relationship with God, we tend to handle these situations better.\u00a0 When we are in communication with God and have the Holy Spirit in us, we can respond in a healthy way.\u00a0 However if we are not in a good place emotionally and are not focused on God it is very easy to respond in unhealthy ways, which leads to a downward spiral.<\/p>\n

About 8 months ago I went through an exercise on forgiveness that I had helped many other people go through.\u00a0 I decided I should do it myself since I am asking others to do it.\u00a0 What happened was a surprise to me and has become a defining moment in my spiritual journey.\u00a0 So here is what happened.<\/p>\n

I found some time to be completely alone and uninterrupted and started by connecting with God through prayer.\u00a0 I asked God to open my mind and my heart to whatever He wanted to do in me.\u00a0 I asked God to bring to my mind all the people that have hurt me in any way.\u00a0 Once I had spent some time in prayer and had mentally & emotionally prepared myself, I got out a piece of paper and started writing down the names that came to my mind.\u00a0 I had done this with other people and some people would only have a few names and others would fill a couple of pages.\u00a0 The key is that you write down all the names God brings to you in that moment, even if you think you have already forgiven them and even if it seems like it was insignificant.<\/p>\n

So I start writing down names, expecting to only have a few because I am a forgiving kind of guy.\u00a0 To my surprise I nearly filled a full sheet of paper.\u00a0 The next thing I did was to write beside each name what that person did to me and how it made me feel.\u00a0 This was the hard part, bringing up all those old thoughts and emotions.\u00a0 It was tempting to skip through this, but I took my time with each name and took myself back to those times I felt hurt, frustrated and angry.\u00a0 I could feel some of those same emotions as I thought about what had happened.<\/p>\n

One of the biggest surprises on my list was an Amish boy I went to Elementary school with.\u00a0 He was a year older than me and I don’t remember much about him other than we got into a fight in the boys restroom one day at school.\u00a0 I don’t remember what we were fighting about, but I do remember how I felt.\u00a0 With a bunch of my friends watching this Amish boy pinned me to the bathroom floor and laughed at me.\u00a0 As I squirmed and tried to free myself I heard others laughing as well.\u00a0 I remember him standing on my ankles and pinning my wrists with his hands.\u00a0 I had not thought about that incident for a very long time, but it was still there in my mind and in my heart.\u00a0 I remember everyone else leaving the bathroom after the fight and I was alone in there.\u00a0 I felt humiliated, angry and weak.\u00a0 As I walked out of the bathroom I remember breaking a small mirror on the wall.<\/p>\n

That memory was buried deep inside me and God brought it out.\u00a0 It helped me to see how that had created some fears inside of me that had stayed with me all these years.<\/p>\n

Once I finished writing out each emotion and circumstance I started to pray through each\u00a0 person.\u00a0 I simply prayed that I choose to forgive the person by name and what they did to me and how it made me feel.\u00a0 I asked God to heal the damaged emotions and help me to release this person and the negative emotions attached to that person.\u00a0 I thanked God for helping me forgive as He forgave me.<\/p>\n

When I finished the last name, I actually felt lighter.\u00a0 Almost like I had lost some weight.\u00a0 I felt free and energized.\u00a0 I spent some time just meditating on God’s goodness, love, acceptance and forgiveness.\u00a0 What an amazing experience!<\/p>\n

I don’t know who God will bring to your mind if you do this exercise, but I do know that there is great freedom and joy when we forgive from the heart.\u00a0 I hope you will take some time to work through this exercise.\u00a0 It might be a good idea to do this once a year to make sure you have not taken back what was given to God.\u00a0 It is almost like a yearly forgiveness checkup.\u00a0 Sometimes it helps to have someone do this exercise with you.\u00a0 I encourage you to find a trustworthy person and ask them to pray for you while you do this exercise.<\/p>\n

One last thing, when you finish the exercise destroy the paper with the names on it.\u00a0 That symbolizes that it is finished and the people and emotions no longer are controlling you or attached to you in a negative way.\u00a0 Forgiveness if the most powerful tool we have to live a healthy, joyful, peaceful life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Unforgiveness is like cancer, it eats away at our insides and causes all kinds of pain and suffering.\u00a0 We live in a world that is not perfect.\u00a0 People let us down, hurt us, disappoint us and sometimes even intentionally cause physical or emotional damage to our lives.\u00a0 When these things happen to us we always … <\/p>\n

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