Five Vital Qualities of a Spiritual Leader

Leadership matters, whether it is in the workplace, the home, at school, in government, in sports, nonprofits or churches. It matters, it makes a difference either good or bad. There are many styles of leadership, and many different kinds of leaders. As a Christian, I see leadership from that perspective. I’ve learned from many leaders over the years, but Jesus Christ continues to be the best example I can find.

No leader is perfect like Jesus was. We will fall short of that, but we can get better and become more like him as we grow. Leaders are learners, but the great leaders also put into practice what they are learning. Often times as leaders we make mistakes and fail, and those are the moments, and times that we learn and grow the most.

The Bible emphasizes strong healthy leadership. Jesus, Paul and other disciples of Jesus taught about the right way to lead and the qualities of a strong healthy leader. These five qualities continue to rise to the top for me. These qualities are ones that I believe a strong, healthy spiritual leader should exhibit and embrace.

  1. Love – I started with love because this is the root and motivation for a spiritual leader. To have a deep love for God and other people is our calling. When you lead with love it changes how you approach people, problems and opportunities. Love drives you to serve the people you are leading. To care for them, and listen to them. Love for God helps a leader have a much bigger perspective on life, the world around us, and the people around us. Love for God transforms our hearts and minds, and keeps us centered and focused on the right things. As we grow in love, we grow in leadership.
  2. Integrity – For me integrity encompasses a lot. It’s being a person that walks the talk. To be a leader with integrity means that you are honest and trustworthy. Paul uses the word blameless, and above reproach in the Bible. A leader with integrity is willing to make difficult decisions, and do what is best for the people and organization and not just himself or herself. A person of integrity does what is right and good even when no one is watching. It’s the mindset of working for God and not man.
  3. Humility – This is also vital to be a strong healthy spiritual leader. Humility is having a right view of yourself, understanding your weaknesses and flaws, but also understanding and embracing your strengths and talents. It’s a selflessness kind of attitude, where you are thinking more about other people than yourself. It’s battling against pride, power and control. Humility is always looking for the best ideas and the best ways to do things, not just the way you think it should be done. It’s the ability to quickly admit when you are wrong, and move to make things right when you make a mistake. Leaders with humility have a strong sense of their true identity in Christ, and can lead from that identity with humility.
  4. Generosity – A generous leader wants to bless other people. Being generous with your time, your talent and your treasure. Strong healthy spiritual leaders are not afraid to share their knowledge and skills to help others. They love to see other people thrive and do well, and help those that are struggling to turn things around. It’s an attitude of giving without expecting anything in return. This also means being a good steward of everything God has entrusted to you. It’s the mindset of God being the owner and we are the manager.
  5. Boldness – This last quality might seem a bit unusual for a list like this. I think it’s important to be bold, because Jesus was bold. He was not afraid to speak the truth, but he always did it with love. He was passionate about what he believed, and cared deeply that others heard the truth. Being bold for a cause means a leader is willing to make sacrifices in order to get there. Being bold means the willingness to take risks, get out of your comfort zone and make hard decisions. Boldness comes from a mindset that because of my identity in Christ I can have courage to be bold for Christ.

I hope these qualities are evident in your leadership. I encourage you to rate yourself on all five. Is that a strength or an area to grow? For me I try to think about ways that I can grow in each of these qualities. What can I do to love better, be a man of integrity, stay humble, be more generous and lead with boldness?

Why Does the Church Exist?

Church has become a negative word to many people these days. For followers of Jesus it can also be challenging, because they may have been hurt, let down, or disappointed by church people or leaders in the past.

However, God set up the church as the way to reach the world with the Good News about Jesus Christ. The church exists to bring glory to God. That is not only true in a worship service, but it is also true of us in life. Look at what 1 Corinthians 10:31 says “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God” . Whatever Christians do, they should be doing it to bring glory to God – in their careers, in their marriages and in the choices they make in life. The church was created to bring pleasure to God and bring glory to his name.

It’s really the people that make up the church, and the people that make up a church are to bring glory to God, we do this in several ways. Jesus gave this compelling vision to the church just before He returned to heaven. in Matthew 28:18-20 “Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

The Five Purposes of the Church

  1. To Make Disciples.

Very clearly one of the main purposes of the church is to make disciples. What is discipleship? It’s exploring God’s ways, it’s becoming more like Christ. It is a life-long process of maturing and growing in your faith. Disciples are learners, learning the ways of Jesus, and walking with him on the narrow road.

2. To Share the Gospel.

In order to become a disciple you first have to meet Jesus and believe in Him as your Lord and Savior. So another important purpose of the church is evangelism. The church is here in order to expand God’s kingdom. Introducing people to the authentic, real Jesus will transform their lives. The people in a church play a big part in this, because as they grow as a follower of Christ, they become more like Jesus and therefore allow other people to see Jesus in them. Everything we do should bring glory to God and draw people closer to Jesus. When we share the love of Christ with others, the Holy Spirit can do transformational work in their hearts.

3. To Worship God.

Another purpose of the church is worship. Christ followers glorify God through worship in all areas of their lives. Worship brings the church to life and life to the church. Worship is exalting God’s worth. We do that many ways in a church setting. We worship through music and singing, through giving and serving, through prayer and reflection, through reading and preaching God’s Word, through communion and baptism. We were created to worship, and the church helps us to live that out in our lives, not just in a church gathering.

4. To Fellowship Together.

We need each other. God created us for community. It is not good to be alone. The church is a great place to build meaningful, life long relationships. It’s a place were we can connect with one another. A place where we can be real and authentic. We do that by worshipping together, serving together, eating together, caring for each other, encouraging each other and doing life together.

5. To Minister to Others.

This last purpose of the church is vital. Everywhere Jesus went, he extended his grace and mercy to those who need it most. When we serve unselfishly, we become extensions of Jesus. Ministering selflessly to a broken and bruised world should characterize every follower of Jesus Christ. This is how the church lives out the mission of making disciples, by being the church to people inside and outside the church. Finding ways to show the love of Christ is ministry.

The church is not perfect, it’s filled with people that are in process with flaws and problems. Yet as we grow and live out these 5 purposes, the church can have a huge impact on the world around us. I hope you will consider being a part of a local church. Pray and ask God to direct you to a church where you can be a part of making a difference in the world, and grow as a disciple.

Seven Things I’ve Learned about Great Leadership

As I reflect on being a leader over the last 30 years, it’s been a process of building, learning and growing. I still believe that everything rises and falls on leadership. The times that I have not lead well, things began to slip whether at work or at home. When I’ve led well progress was made and change happened, in me and others. I’ve learned so much and still have a lot to learn and improve on, but I would like to share some of what I believe about leadership.

I’d like to share seven thoughts about leadership, and what great leaders do.

  1. Great leaders develop people – People development should be a daily event, integrated into every interaction and conversation. As a leader you are constantly evaluating things and people around you. Are the right people in the right position, who needs more attention, what resources are needed to help them grow, are our systems encouraging growth, learning and improvement. Encouragement is a big part of developing people, building up their self-confidence, encouraging risk taking and constant improvement. Leaders need to mentor, coach and counsel the people they lead. The only way to do that is by getting to know them, their personalities, what motivates them, what their strengths and weaknesses are, and what they are passionate about.
  2. Great leaders cast vision – Vision leaks and it’s the leaders responsibility to keep filling people up with the vision. If there is no vision the organization, the family, the relationship will decline. To cast vision you must be clear about what the vision really is. The vision can’t be constantly changing. Dripping the vision consistently, rewarding people that get it and living it out as an example.
  3. Great leaders build trust – Trust is built over time by being consistent, doing what you say, listening, and being humble. Leaders take responsibility for when things go wrong and they generously pass around praise when things go right. Trust building also comes from good decisions, asking for peoples input, and doing what is best for your company, your family or the relationship. It also makes a huge difference to admit when you were wrong and to ask for forgiveness when you make a mistake. Trust takes a long time to build, but can be lost very quickly with one bad decision or mistake. What helps me is to have some other leaders around me that know me and hold me accountable, pray for me and encourage me.
  4. Great leaders make the tough calls – Tough calls can bring on criticism, resistance and complaints. Leaders that are willing to make difficult decisions do that because of the vision, the values, and the culture they are passionate about. Anything that derails that or distracts from that, needs to be changed or eliminated. The ability to make the tough calls comes from years of experience, failure and victories. It’s also vital to have some trusted advisors or mentors that can help you when you are facing a tough decision.
  5. Great leaders serve – Serving the people around you is one of the primary functions of a leader. What I mean by that is good leaders look for ways to make things better for their people. What resources are needed? What information is needed? What questions need to be asked? Who needs to rest or slow down? Who needs to be challenged more? The best way to do this is by meeting with your people, asking questions, getting to know them better, and really caring about them. Great leaders serve!
  6. Great leaders inspire – Inspiration comes from a compelling vision, but it also comes from being a good example. Leaders that live out what they say and lead by example inspire others to do the same. Leaders that take risks, learn through failure, and lead with integrity inspire people and give people the courage to do the same. Inspiration comes from the words leaders use and the actions they take.
  7. Great leaders are humble – Humility is the key to great leadership. Thinking about what is best for others and not yourself. Being open to new ideas or other people’s opinions. Admitting when you make a mistake, and owning bad decisions. Being humble does not mean you are weak, it really means you are strong and confident. It means you are not afraid to surround yourself with people more talented than you are. Leaders that have the combination of humility and persistence are the leaders people want to follow.

There is so much more to leadership, but if you work on just a few of these things you can grow as a leader. If you are struggling as a leader, keep going, it’s in the struggling that you become the leader God created you to be.

The last thing I will say about great leadership is that faith in Jesus Christ has been a game changer for me. Jesus is the best leader this world has ever seen. Simply studying and following the life of Jesus will make you a better leader. Putting your faith and trust in him changes your eternal destiny. He is all seven of those things in perfection, and so much more.

Identity Crisis

In our world today there is a lot of confusion about identity. Many are putting their identity in sexual orientation, gender, political beliefs or even a sports team. There is also massive confusion about who God is and who Jesus Christ is. Religious beliefs and teachings can further confuse people.

As a follower of Jesus Christ, and a believer in Jesus Christ, my identity is in Him. If you are also a believer then your identity should also be in Christ. We are now children of God, part of the family, and God is central in everything we think, say and do.

Most Christ followers need reminded from time to time of who they are in Christ. I often will read through things that help me to remember who I am. I want to share some of the things that have helped me over the years. I hope this is helpful to you as well.

The Apostle Paul shares our lofty position in Christ when he wrote, “To the saints who are in Ephesus, and are faithful in Christ Jesus” (Ephesians. 1:1). As you read this, put your name in the following:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed (name) in Christ with every spiritual blessings in the heavenly places, even as He chose (name) in Him before the foundation of the world, that (name) should be holy and blameless before Him. In love He predestined (name) for adoption through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His will, to the praise of His glorious grace, with which He has blessed (name) in the Beloved. In Him (name) has redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace, which He lavished upon (name) . . . In Him (name) has obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His will . . . In Him (name) also, when (name) heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in Him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of (name) inheritance until (name) acquires possession of it (Eph. 1:3-14).

Understanding your identity in Christ is absolutely essential to your success at living the victorious Christian life! Slowly read through the following list, maybe even read it out loud. Let these statements sink deep into your soul. Look up the Scriptures and keep drinking it in.

I am accepted . . . 

John 1:12 I am God’s child.

John 15:15 I am Christ’s friend.

Rom. 5:1 I have been justified.

1 Cor. 6:17 I am united with the Lord, and I am one spirit with Him.

1 Cor. 6:19-20 I have been bought with a price. I belong to God.

1 Cor. 12:27 I am a member of Christ’s body.

Eph. 1:1 I am a saint.

Eph. 1:5 I have been adopted as God’s child.

Eph. 2:18 I have direct access to God through the Holy Spirit.

Col. 1:14 I have been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins.

Col. 2:10 I am complete in Christ.

I am secure . . . 

Rom.  8:1-2 I am free forever from condemnation.

Rom. 8:28 I am assured that all things work together for good.

Rom. 8:31-34 I am free from any condemning charges against me.

Rom. 8:35-39 I cannot be separated from the love of God.

2 Cor. 1:21-22 I have been established, anointed, and sealed by God.

Col. 3:3 I am hidden with Christ in God.

Phil. 1:6 I am confident that the good work God has begun in me will 

be perfected.

Phil. 3:20 I am a citizen of heaven.

2 Tim. 1:7 I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a 

sound mind.

Heb. 4:16 I can find grace and mercy in time of need.

1 John 5:18 I am born of God, and the evil one cannot touch me.

I am significant . . .

Matt. 5:13-14 I am the salt and light of the earth.

John 15:1,5 I am a branch of the true vine, a channel of His life.

John 15:16 I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit.

Acts 1:8 I am a personal witness of Christ’s.

1 Cor. 3:16 I am God’s temple.

2 Cor. 5:17-21 I am a minister of reconciliation for God.

2 Cor. 6:1 I am God’s coworker (1 Cor. 3:9).

Eph. 2:6 I am seated with Christ in the heavenly realm.

Eph. 2:10 I am God’s workmanship.

Eph. 3:12 I may approach God with freedom and confidence.

Phil. 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!

(From Living Free in Christ by Dr. Neil Anderson)

The more you reaffirm who you are in Christ, the more your behavior will begin to reflect your true identity!”
(From Victory Over the Darkness by Dr. Neil Anderson)

Five ways to work on your marriage

As we start a new year many people are thinking about what they want to work on or improve in 2023. For those of us that are married that relationship is often something we would like to improve. Every marriage has difficulties and challenges, that’s normal. The reality is that many couples don’t work through issues and let them pile up over many years.

As you start your new year I hope you will set a few goals, or ideas on how you can work on the most important relationship you have, your marriage. I would like to share five ways that you can work on improving your marriage. Some of these might click and be helpful and some may not. The point is to work at, and be intentional about being a better husband or wife.

  1. Work at being a better listener.

Most of the conflict we experience comes from misunderstandings or simply not listening. This skill can improve any relationship and make the other person feel more valued. How do I do that? A few things that help me, include turning off any distractions like the TV or phone. Turn to the person and give them your full attention. Once your spouse has shared what’s on their mind, repeat back what you heard or ask clarifying questions. The goal is to understand what they said. You might even ask if they want your opinion or to just listen.

Listening also includes reading their body language and tone of voice. That will help you to understand if this is very important, or are they upset, hurt, or confused. The reason to do this is that good listener also connect emotionally. You can actually acknowledge the emotion by saying something like this: Honey I can see you’re very upset, how can I help? Make it a goal in 2023 to be a better listener, before you talk with your spouse remind yourself to listen more and speak less.

2. Work at being a better communicator

This is another area a lot of people struggle with. Misunderstandings and conflict often happen when things are not clear, or are said in a way that is confusing or even hurtful. For some it might be not talking enough, not sharing and keeping things to yourself. For others it might be talking too much and people get lost or lose focus.

For those that don’t talk much, I urge you to work on talking more with your spouse. Talking is a way to connect with each other and to feel like you are letting the other person into your world. When you think about something try to follow through and actually say it to the other person, as long as it’s not hurtful or mean. If you have something important to tell your spouse you might even practice out loud, or write it down before you have the conversation. It’s also very important in communication to be clear and try not to have serious conversations when you are highly emotional.

For those that talk too much, work on reading the other person. Are they starting to zone out or get distracted? If so, stop talking and ask if they have any questions or input into what you have been talking about. You should also practice condensing your stories and not sharing all the fine details. What is your main point you want to make?

In 2023 work to be more clear and open in your communication with your spouse. By open, I mean sharing at a deeper level, being more vulnerable and honest. That means taking a risk and opening up. If you’re not able to do that, then I suggest talking with a trusted mentor or counselor about how you can work on your communication.

3. Work at expressing love.

You made a commitment to love and to cherish till death do you part when you got married. To improve your marriage, it’s important to express love on a regular basis. That’s more than simply saying I love you. I’m talking about the Five Love Languages: Acts of Service, Physical Touch, Gifts, Words of Affirmation and Quality Time. All of these are important but everyone has one or two that means a lot more than others. Words of Affirmation is by far the top one for me. A word of encouragement is like fuel for my soul.

If you don’t know your spouses love language make that a goal in 2023 to learn what it is, and then work at speaking that to your spouse more often. One way to do that is to read the book Five Love Languages or do a google search and find information about each of the five love languages. Then have a conversation with your spouse about what theirs is and what yours is. I wrote an article about this back in 2015 called How to communicate with your spouse.

4. Work at praying for your spouse.

If you are a Christian then prayer should be an important part of your life. If it’s not then start there. Simply be more intentional about talking with God, share your heart with Him as well as your frustrations. Give him praise and thanks on a regular basis.

Start the practice of praying for your spouse, listen for things you can pray about, share things with your spouse, if they are a Christian that they can pray about for you. Write things down so you remember and try to pray several times a week for them. Keep it simple but work at doing it consistently.

This will be a big step to improving your marriage. Prayer is powerful and affective. Taking a moment to simply say a short prayer for your spouse and kids, with him or her will go a long way to building love, connection and intimacy in your marriage.

5. Work at spending time together.

Most married couples find it hard to have time for each other. Raising kids, working and taking care of the house are challenging and keep us busy. Then add sports, hobbies, getting groceries, and even church activities and there isn’t much time for each other.

In 2023 be more intentional about scheduling time together, whether that’s a date night or simply a quiet evening together each week. Talk about what works for you, and then schedule it. Get a baby sitter if you have to, but try to make this happen more often this year. Also work on being more fully present when you are together. We often are consumed with work, finances, special projects or hobbies and don’t give our full attention to our spouse. It takes work and planning to spend time together but it’s worth it in the long run.

I could keep going but those 5 are a good start. Look for more ideas coming soon.

Obey Like Jesus

If ever there was a word that makes us cringe, it would be obedience. For a lot of folks, obedience has a negative connotation. Maybe it reminds you of your failures, your inability to measure up to some standard. Maybe it reminds you of someone in your past (a parent, or a pastor) who used religion to manipulate you.

As Parents you want your children to “obey” you. Not because they are afraid of you, but because they trust you. Lots of kids rebel against authority, especially their parents. They experiment on how far they can push it. They want to go their own way, even if you as the parent know better. Honestly many adults are also rebelling, doing their own thing and not obeying authority figures, especially God.

When it comes to obeying someone, it’s a lot easier to obey someone you trust and feel loved by. However, not everyone who insists on obedience does so out of love for us. Some people throw this word around like a hand grenade, and do a lot of damage in the name of God. Obedience is a power word. Usually when someone insists on our obedience it’s a “red flag.” Some people use this word to conceal their ambitions, hidden agenda, and selfishness. Emotionally abusive people love to use this word as they tread all over us like a doormat.

From a Biblical perspective, we’re always living in obedience to someone, or something. And so our obedience can be directed toward God, or it can be dislocated away from God.

“Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness?” Romans 6:16

We can be mastered by sin just as readily as anything. So we obey our addictions. We obey our lusts. We obey our appetite for caffeine, alcohol, sugars, carbs.  We obey our materialistic impulses–the idol of bigger, better, faster, newer, shinier. We obey our tech impulses, new and better devices. Few masters are more ruthless than our desires.

At first our lusts isolate us from others. We withdrawal to do our thing. Then they demand greater commitment. Time, energy, resources, relationships, life. At first we try to manage them, until they finally consume us, destroying us in the end.

In Mark 7:8 Jesus observes how we “lay aside the commands of God to obey the traditions of men.”

We can identify as a certain denomination instead of a follower of Jesus. We obey the traditions we learned instead of the person we love, Jesus. Instead of serving God, sometimes we can become servants of our religious/political ideologies.

The masses didn’t crucify Jesus because he was the Son of God, or was obeying God. They killed him because he didn’t obey their traditions. In John 12:43 he describes how people “love human praise more than praise from God.” How many times have you felt conviction about some great thing God put on your heart, only to realize that your spouse, a boyfriend/ girlfriend, your kids, a friend was not on board, or disagreed with you? So instead of pressing forward, you relented, and gave in to the pressure. Our need for affirmation, and approval is so strong, we will cave rather than risk the disapproval of others. It’s like a law has been passed: “I have to be liked.” I need a Facebook thumbs up, a Twitter retweet, to have the validation I need in life. Do we obey men, or do we obey God?

Galatians 2:16 says, “…we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we might be made right with God because of our faith in Christ, not because we have obeyed the law. For no one will ever be made right with God by obeying the law” (NLT).

The Bible describes how people believe they are accepted by God by obeying all the laws God has given. So like the Rich Young Ruler, people try to establish their own righteousness before God. Our checklists become a source of pride for us, and they become a sort of litmus test by which we gauge other’s sincerity, spirituality, or faith. “I don’t ever miss church. I read my Bible. I’ve been baptized. I tithe. I volunteer. I go to Bible study. I go on missions trips. I care about orphans, widows, prisoners, the hungry, the sick. . . I, I, I…” Our selective, cherry-picked lists can give us a false sense of confidence before God.

God’s standard is Galatians 3:10, “For all who rely on the works of the law are under a curse, as it is written: “Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the Law.”

Who or what do you most obey? Jesus’ obedience wasn’t oriented around things… it was oriented to Father. Look at how Jesus obeyed. In John 8:28-30 Jesus says, “… I do nothing on My own initiative, but I speak these things as the Father taught Me. “ And He who sent Me is with Me; He has not left Me alone, for I always do the things that are pleasing to Him.”  

Philippians 2:8, “… being found in the appearance as a man, Jesus humbled himself by becoming obedient to death–even death on a cross!” 

To Obey Like Jesus: First, obedience is all about relationship. “Obedience or trusting obedience is God’s love language.” The “heart” of obedience is pleasing the Father in everything–i.e. in all we say and do. He is pleased when we obey because he knows that means we trust him. When we trust God we want to obey God, When we have a relationship with Jesus and are intimate with our Father God we don’t obey out of fear, it’s out of love. 2 John 1:6 says, “And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.” 1 John 5:3, “For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments; and His commandments are not burdensome.”

Second, grace is the basis for our relationship with God. We are saved through faith in Christ alone, by virtue of Christ’s sacrifice, His perfect righteousness, His blood. The best we can do is respond to God’s offer of mercy. We can confess Jesus as Lord. We can repent and turn to God. We can pledge our lives to him in baptism. Ephesians 2:8-9 says, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith–and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God– not by works, so that no one can boast.” Faith in Jesus Christ leads to being born again spiritually. You are a new person and that new person begins to grow in love for Jesus. As that love grows, trust increases and obedience increases.

Third, obedience is God’s prescription for blessing. God’s commands carry a blessing, a promise, a reward. God’s promise to the children of Abraham is that if they obeyed God, it would go well for them, they would live a long life, and receive inheritance. If we sow obedience, we reap God’s very best in our lives. In Luke 11:28 Jesus says, “Blessed are those who hear the word of God and obey it.”  I even noticed in 1 John 3:22 that obedience makes our prayers more powerful. John says, “If our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we keep his commands and do what pleases him.”

Last, obedience is evidence our faith is alive, not dead. James says faith without works is DOA (James 2:17).  1 John 2:5-6 says, “But if anyone obeys his word, love for God is truly made complete in them. This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus lived.”  If our faith is alive, real, vibrant, sincere, it will show itself in how we live. Obedience is the inevitable fruit of saving faith.  In the end, God judges our faith by every word spoken, and every deed done, whether in public or private.

Who will you obey?

Lead like Jesus

A big part of my story is working in the business world before being called into full time pastoral ministry. Those 15 years did a lot to prepare me for ministry. But it was the way God gave me a passion to be a better leader, to learn, grow and teach about leadership that really prepared me for the last 20 years in full time ministry.

I read books by the hundreds, I went to conferences and workshops and served on boards and advanced at work. I got involved at my church and started serving and helping lead the church as a volunteer.

My life mission statement became Growing myself and others in Faith, Character and Leadership. I say all that to say this. Our world is in desperate need of leadership! Not just any leadership, but leaders like Jesus.

I really believe that if more Christians would be like Jesus everyone in the world would want to be a christian. Becoming like Jesus is something all Christians should be desiring and longing for.

How many of you would consider yourself to be a leader? Well I believe that all of us are leaders. The reason I say that is because when you boil it down, leadership is influence. If you are a parent or grandparent you have influence! If you are married you have influence! If you have friends you have influence, If you have brothers or sisters you have influence, If you have co-workers you have influence. As a christian you have influence, you have the Holy Spirit, access to God 24/7. That makes you different than the world, that gives you something to contribute to the world.

Jesus is the best Leadership model of all time. Jesus was the most influential leader that ever lived. He was the GOAT – No one even comes close. How do I know that? Who would have thought that a carpenter and a few followers would be more influential than the Roman empire, but today we name our children after Jesus and his followers, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Paul, Mary, Martha, Rhoda, Rebecca – and we name our cats and dogs, Nero, Caesar.

So how do we lead like Jesus, How can we become more like him in the way we influence others around us? Let’s look in Matthew. Here we find two of the disciples jockeying for position in Jesus kingdom, they even brought their mom. They wanted to be rulers like the Roman empire they were under. They expected Jesus to overthrow the roman empire and set up a new kingdom. Then the mother of the sons of Zebedee came up to him with her sons, and kneeling before him she asked him for something. Verse 21 “And he said to her, “What do you want?” She said to him, “Say that these two sons of mine are to sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your kingdom.” 22 Jesus answered, “You do not know what you are asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I am to drink?” They said to him, “We are able.” 23 He said to them, “You will drink my cup, but to sit at my right hand and at my left is not mine to grant, but it is for those for whom it has been prepared by my Father.” 24 And when the ten heard it, they were indignant at the two brothers. 25 But Jesus called them to him and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. 26 It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, 27 and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, 28 even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

As a Christian you are bound to obey Jesus, his commands and teachings. Servant leadership is not a suggestion from Jesus it is a mandate, or a command. When it comes to leading like Jesus it starts in your heart,  your why. It’s a character question – Are you here to serve or be served? Trusting God, believing his promises, understanding who God is and having a close intimate relationship with your loving heavenly Father wipes out our fears.

The heart thing is really important because if you don’t get the heart right you’re not gonna be able to be like Jesus. Jesus came to change our hearts.

The second thing that helps us to Lead like Jesus is our Head, having the head of a servant.  That means thinking like a servant, thinking like Jesus. Jesus’ vision was making his disciples fishers of men. What he wanted to accomplish was for them to “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you.” Matthew 28:19-20

The third part of servant leadership which is the Hands of a servant leader -being a servant, steward, and shepherd.  The hands part of being is servant leader is asking how can I help you? 

The last part of being a servant leader is Habits. Every morning the enemy is waiting to get you  off track, to feed your ego, to  puff up your  pride or feed your fear. How do you recalibrate yourself on a daily basis, so you can be the leader God wants you to be every day? In Mark chapter 1 we see Jesus healing many people and teaching many people and drawing big crowds. It says he got up very early in the morning while it was still dark and departed to a desolate or solitary place and there he prayed. The disciples were looking for him because people had gathered again to hear from him and to be healed, but he said  Let us go on to the next towns, that I may preach there also for that is why I came out. Remember to lead like Jesus we need his Heart, Head, Hands and Habits.

Lead on!

Three Relationship Tips

We were created for relationships. God made us to be in relationship with other people, and with him. When we are not in healthy relationships our lives are more difficult, dark, and lonely. In order to improve our relationships with people and God, here are three simple things we can do to grow, and become more healthy.

  1. Spend Time Together – If you don’t intentionally spend time together, you don’t get to know the other person. It’s in those times together, that the relationship has a chance to grow, both deeper and closer. Regular touches face to face, eye to eye, where you talk, catch up, ask questions, encourage and resolve conflict. When it comes to spending time with God, it also takes being intentional. The ways I do that is mainly through prayer, simply talking and listening to God. Reading Scripture is another way I connect with him. Musical worship, meditation and being out in creation are other ways I connect with God. Whether it’s another person or God, make time for each other. Plan times together where you are not interrupted or distracted.
  2. Listen and Pay Attention – This is a huge thing in relationships. Most conflict happens because of misunderstandings. When you are with a person you care about, practice active listening, by asking clarifying questions. Pay attention to their non verbal language. Be fully present by not being distracted by your phone, the TV, or other people. This is a great way to let someone know you care about them, by listening and paying attention. How are you doing in listening and paying attention to God and what he is saying to you?
  3. Practice Forgiveness – No relationship can last without giving and receiving forgiveness. We all are imperfect and make mistakes. We can and do hurt each other, maybe unintentionally or maybe intentionally. Forgiveness is the secret sauce to a healthy relationship. It helps us to keep short accounts and not let things build up. Forgiveness is the beginning of healing and helps us to not keep score or bring up old hurts from the past. Forgiving is not forgetting, but it can lead to forgetting, or to not holding an offense against someone.

I could give many more tips on healthy relationships. The big thing to me is that any relationship that is important will take work. The more work you put into the relationship the healthier it becomes. Anything that is neglected tends to deteriorate. Don’t let that happen to your relationships. Make time and find ways to build up and improve your relationships. You will never regret that effort.

A Tribute to my Dad

Loyal Stutzman 1944-2021

Growing up with a dad is so important. I was blessed to have a dad for most of my life. There are so many things we learn from our parents about how to live life, and be successful. Parents help to shape their children and guide them to know right and wrong, to make good decisions and to learn skills, habits and abilities.

Children also can learn negative things at home and can experience lifelong damage as a result of a parents actions, inactions, words or beliefs. Being in ministry I’m constantly reminded about the many hurting broken families in this world. The real hardships and struggles that many people go through. Growing up without a dad or a mom is very hard.

Having a dad that has faith in Jesus and lives his life for Him first is a precious gift to his children. I was blessed to grow up in such a home. My dad loved the Lord and and taught us to do the same through his actions and words.

My dad passed away a few days ago and it’s caused me to think back to my early years at home and my memories of my dad. I have to say I’ve actually smiled more than I’ve cried so far. Looking at the many pictures has triggered some great memories about my dad. The times of gathering as a family, eating Sunday dinners together (meatloaf made a regular appearance). I also remember going to church as a family, doing family devotions together and praying for our extended family together. I remember the Christmas gatherings with food and presents, and dad would always read the Christmas story about Jesus.

As I grew older we still got together on a fairly regular basis. For a while we went to dad & moms place every Tuesday night for supper. We would eat and laugh and talk about what was going on in our lives.

As I and my brothers got married and started families these gathering times were less frequent but always special when we did get together.

As I think about my dad there are so many lessons I learned by simply watching him and listening to him over the years. Here are a few that are special to me and that I have taken on as his son.

  • Work hard and Provide for your family – My dad drove truck for most of his life. He worked hard and gave his best at all the jobs he had. He learned to drive and loved the open road and seeing the country. The people that worked with my dad saw how reliable, honest and trustworthy he was. My dad’s CB handle was the Wood Chopper, I don’t know why, maybe because he snored so loud or maybe because he worked so hard. He logged over a million miles and rarely complained, steady and reliable. Because he drove long distance sometimes we was not home a lot during the week. That is what made the weekends so special for us boys.
  • Eat good food and enjoy life – My dad liked to eat! I get my shape from him. He liked most kinds of food and really enjoyed my moms cooking. He called my moms cooking eating at Susie’s Diner. He loved sandwiches and soup. He also loved breakfast, eating eggs and bacon. I am the same way. Dad also liked to laugh and joke. He loved to share a good joke and laugh.
  • Be a Man of Integrity – My dad was a man of character and integrity. If he said he was going to do something he did it. If he made a mistake he would admit it. If he needed help he would ask for it. He told the truth and expected us boys to also be truthful. I was a bit of a challenge as a kid growing up. Dad was always gentle but firm. I don’t ever remember him saying a bad word or putting me down or even yelling at us. He would punish us when we where bad, but he also showed love and compassion.
  • Serve God and other people – My Dad was very active in his local church, serving in many different capacities. He was a song leader, something he learned growing up. He sang in a men’s quartet for a number of years and then used that gift to serve his local church. He also taught the adult Sunday School classes many times over the years. He also served in leadership at his church as the Administrator and then as an Elder. He used his influence to encourage people and mentor people over the years as well.
  • Be Humble – My Dad was very humble and did not want to be the center of attention. He was content to work in the background, but was willing to step up when he had to. Anyone that knew my dad knew that he was a kind, gentle, wise man.
  • Be a man of Faith – The best thing about my dad was that he was a follower of Jesus Christ. He loved the Lord and had a personal relationship with Jesus. That was the most important part of his life. His faith guided every other part of his life. His faith impacted his marriage of 55 years. It impacted the way he raised his three boys. It impacted how he worked and how he served. What I saw in my dad was an unswerving faith. He loved to talk about end times and read prophesy books. It makes me smile to know that he is in heaven and with Jesus and knows exactly what that is like. I love to think about how he is seeing many family and loved ones that are also there and that some day I will get to see him again.

Because of his faith in Jesus, we do not need to be troubled.  Yes we hurt and are sad, but what a tremendous gift he has given to our family.  To know that he is now in heaven, because of his relationship with Jesus.

In John Chapter 14 Jesus said these words to His disciples after he told them he was going to die.  

“Do not let your hearts be troubled.  Trust in God; trust also in me.  In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you.  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.  You know the place where I am going.”

One of his disciples named Thomas asked the question many of us would ask.  We don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way.

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me.”  Because of my dad’s faith we do not need to be troubled, we know he is in a much better place and is serving God in heaven as we speak.  

Jesus made it very clear that there is only one way to heaven and that is by believing and receiving Jesus Christ.

You see, there are two things that are going to last forever, One is your spirit.  The Bible says that God placed eternity in hearts of men.  That means we will live forever somewhere; either in the presence of a loving God or separated from Him forever and ever.  We were made to last forever, our brains do not know how to process death and that is why we must go through the grieving process.  Our brains were not wired for death.

It all depends on what you do with the person of Jesus Christ.  

The second thing that will last forever is the Word of God.  The Bible says that the grass will wither and the flower will die, but the Word of God will stand forever.

I believe that Dad would want me to share the four things that God wants you to know from His word.  Because he loved his family and friends he would be very concerned about all of you following him to heaven to be reunited again some day.  He would want all of you to know what he knows.

First, God wants you to know that He wants you to experience Peace and have eternal life.  God loves you, and He wants you to experience His peace as a way of life.  The Bible says, “We have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.”  And The gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”  

The second thing God wants you to know is that you are separated from God by your Sin.

Sin means missing the mark.  Sin is also the selfish attitude of ignoring or rejecting God and going our own way.  Our sin causes a gap between us and God.

God did not make us to be robots and force us to serve Him.  He gave us free will and freedom to choose.  We often choose to disobey and go our own way.  When you disobey God, you and I sin, and that separates us from God.  The Bible says, “For all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God.  That puts all of us in the same boat.  

Many times we try to overcome this issue of sin by doing good things.  If I could just do some good works then maybe I could tip the scales and God will let me in.  “I am basically a good person, I haven’t hurt anyone and I try to do the right thing most of the time.”  So we work hard at being good, but how good is good enough?  We can ever know for sure if we have done enough good to make the cut.  So we try to bridge that gap between us and God with good works, never knowing if I am good enough.

The third thing that God wants us to know is that the answer to this problem of sin and separation from God is Jesus Christ.

Jesus Christ is the only answer to the problem of separation from God.  God knew we could never be good enough on our own.  He had a plan all along, He sent his perfect son to take our place, to stand in that gap for us.  Jesus died on the cross and rose from the dead to pay the penalty our sins require.  It has been paid in full.  Jesus has bridged that gap that separates you from God.  The Bible says, “God demonstrates His own love for us in this:  While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”  And in the book of John Jesus said “ I tell you the truth, whoever hears My Word and believes Him who sent Me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life.”

The last thing that God wants you to know is that you can receive Christ.  You can receive Christ as your Savior and Lord when you believe in His word and trust in only Him to save you.  The Bible says:  “To all who receive Him, to those who believe in His name, He gave the right to become children of God.”  What an amazing gift.

To receive Christ you need to admit you have missed the mark, be willing to turn from your sin, believe that Jesus Christ died for you on the cross as the sacrifice, covering all your sins, and rose from the grave, defeating Satan and death and finally through prayer, invite Jesus to come in to your life and receive Him as your Savior.

Maybe you have never really accepted Jesus Christ as your Savior.  Maybe you don’t know if you would go to heaven if you died today.  By sincerely praying a simple prayer and believing it with all your heart you can have that assurance today.  

Dear Lord Jesus, I know that I have sinned against you.  I know I can’t pay you back and make it right.  I believe that you paid for my sins by dying on the cross.  I am truly sorry for all my sins.  Right now I open the door of my heart and ask you to come in and forgive me.  I want to follow you as best I can.  Thank you for giving me the gift of forgiveness and eternal life.  Thank you for saving me right now.  In Jesus name Amen.

My last memory of my dad was him slowly standing up giving me a hug and saying I love you. I’ll treasure that the rest of my life.

I

Four Tips on Dealing with Change

There is one thing you can be sure of, and that is things will change. We are all facing changes, some big and some small. Our bodies are changing because of the aging process, our eating and exercising habits. Our finances are changing based on choices and decisions we make.

The world around us is also changing. People are pushing for their agenda, their beliefs, their values, their convictions. The way we communicate is changing and the way we interact is changing. Technology is changing rapidly. Even what is viewed as right and wrong is changing.

With all this change happening, how do we cope with or manage the changes in our lives? Here are some thoughts I hope will help.

  1. Seek Wise Counsel – This is a biblical principle that helps a lot. For me the first place I go for wise counsel is God. If I’m facing a change, or have to make a decision because of change, I start by praying and talking to God about it. I also read God’s Word. I will also talk to trusted friends and family about the change, ask them questions and even ideas on what to do. For big changes that are causing stress, seeking out a counselor, pastor or mentor can be a big help. The key here is to humble yourself and talk to God and wise people to help you navigate some of life’s biggest changes.
  2. Focus on what you can control – There are so many things that are out of our control. When we start to think about the things we can control it really comes back to us. We can control the words that we speak, the emails or social media posts we write. We can control the way we respond to change and conflict. We can control what read, who we listen to, and the choices we make. Emotions can be hard to control, but we can be aware of what emotions we are feeling. When we do respond in a bad way, we do have control of what we do after that. We can ask for forgiveness, we can bring clarity and ask questions to try to better understand.
  3. Remember what you’re grateful for – Grateful people are much better at handling change. It helps to think about the good things in our lives instead of focusing on the negative and whats out of our control. It’s very helpful to actually write down things you are grateful for on a regular basis. We all need to keep the right perspective when it comes to change. Change can be hard, but it can also be helpful and good in the long run. Remembering what we are grateful for is vital to working through changes.
  4. Get back up – When change hits us and knocks us down, don’t stay down there. Get back up and keep moving forward. Maybe you go talk to someone about what just happened. Maybe you go spend some time with God. Maybe you go on a walk or a run or exercise. Maybe you list out 10 things you’re grateful for. Maybe you go do some research on what happened to better understand what is going on. This is about being resilient, it’s the quality that keeps us going, growing and making a difference.

Change is going to happen, but it doesn’t have to make your life miserable unless you choose to let it. You don’t have to embrace change, but you do need to deal with it, and choose to get better as a result of whatever happens to you.