Personal Growth – Page 4

January 22, 2018

7 Leadership Insights I Learned in Ministry

I’ve been in ministry full time for over 15 years and I’ve learned a lot and made a lot of mistakes. The church I work at went from single site in a small town to a major relocation to a bigger facility to multi-site now with five locations. I was involved with leading the relocation of two of the sites from a portable campus to a permanent site. I’ve been a part of a lot of change and challenges over the years. I’ve grown as a leader and I’ve struggled as a leader. I believe there are some basic things that help a lot in ministry, do these basics well and you will lead well.

Here are seven things I’ve learned and believe about leadership.

Relationships are more important than Systems – Effective, well thought out systems are vital to an organizations health, but people are more important. Every person that attends our church is important, and every person that does not attend our church is important. Each person matters to God and so they must matter to us. When going through explosive growth it’s easy to miss the relational part of ministry. That is when you must work hard to meet with people and listen to them. I have learned so much by simply meeting with people and listening to them. listening to their story and sharing parts of yours is so important when building relationships.
Communicate with your team often – Even when there is nothing new to report, it’s important to communicate with your team on a regular basis. As a leader, I wake up every day thinking about what needs to happen to get us to where we are headed. The volunteers I am leading have many other things to think about, like their own jobs and families. The more I can communicate about what is going on, the better my relationship with the people I lead. Open honest communication builds trust, it also motivates and encourages and allows people to ask clarifying questions. When you don’t communicate you are communicating and that’s when people start loosing interest, or fill in the blanks themselves.
Trust that God is working in ways you do not see – In ministry, things don’t always line up like you would like them to be. As a leader, I am responsible for my own actions and to make plans and develop strategy. It is also my responsibility to be flexible and to include God in everything. The deeper my trust in God the stronger my faith grows. If we figure everything out on our own, we don’t need God to show up. When you take on a big vision, only God can make it happen, we need to trust and obey.
Trust the leaders around you – I must choose to trust and not to be suspicious of the leaders above me and around me. The more I choose to trust the more my heart remains in the right place. When I start to fill in the blanks with my own ideas, I begin to head into a downward spiral. When I believe the best about the people leading me, I can then lead with integrity and passion. Trust builds a culture of emotional health and stability. It’s also important that you are trustworthy and lead well in the area entrusted to you. This becomes even more important and difficult as you add multiple sites. You are not as close to the leaders as you used to be so trust becomes vital to moving things forward in a healthy way.
Do more than rally the troops – You must do more than talk the talk, you need to walk the walk and make things happen. That means doing what you say and equipping your volunteers to do what they are asked to do. It means taking the time to develop people rather than just direct people. When you build meaningful relationships with people they will follow you through the most difficult of times. When you pay attention to the details and delegate to people that can get things done your influence goes up. Don’t just try to pump people up, pour into them and love them. The only way to do that is by allowing God to pour into you and to keep growing as a leader.
You have to be real – People are looking for real leaders that admit their mistakes and take responsibility. Be quick to admit mistakes and ask for forgiveness and extend the same to others. Don’t put on the religious mask, where you try to make people think that everything is just perfect. That is only possible if you are sure of your identity and comfortable with who you are. I have learned that I need to be me and not someone I think people want. The more I am the person God created me to be the more influence God gives me.
Be as clear as possible – Clarity is one of the most difficult things to do as a leader. It is easy to dance around the issues and not give direct answers. Sometimes there are things that I just cannot share with people, so I need to be honest about that and let them know that I will share details when I can. To be clear as a leader means taking time to think about what you are going to say. It means you can’t just shoot from the hip, but take time to aim before delivering the message. Being clear is a way of honoring people and letting them know you care. Whether it’s in an email, in a meeting or face to face be honest about what is happening or what happened. Share as much information as possible. That will build trust and respect.

When things are changing all around me and the pace seems to be higher than what I can stand, it helps to step back and trust God and obey what he tells me. When things are busy and hectic I need to make sure that I am praying and communicating with God. I also need to be reading the Bible to build my intimacy with God and get wisdom and direction. One thing that has helped me in this area and many others is having people in my life to ask me how I am doing in some of these areas. Having accountability in my life has brought growth and freedom into my life.

Lead On!

December 21, 2017February 14, 2018

Be Generous

It’s the most generous time of the year. For many people Christmas time is a time to be generous with family, friends and even strangers. It’s also the end of the year and people are thinking of year end giving. I want to talk about generosity and what that really means.

As a follower of Jesus one of my desires is to be known as a generous person. Jesus was very generous with his time, talent and treasure. He taught many life-changing messages and stories about being generous. He even gave his life for our sins.

Generosity is demonstrating the nature of God by wisely reinvesting the resources that He has entrusted to us. There are several key traits that go into making someone generous. Without these in our lives we cannot be truly generous.

Loving – It is not possible to have love without generosity, but it is possible to have generosity without love. If you have the love of Christ in you, then generosity should flow out of you. It should be a part of your nature to be generous and look for ways to give and serve others. 1 John 3:17 says “If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need, but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him?
Sowing – Generosity follows the law of the harvest. The more generous we are in sowing, the greater will be our harvest in true riches. 2 Corinthians 9:6 says “Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously.
Honoring – Honor means “to place value upon.” We are instructed in Ephesians 6:12 to honor our parents. We honor civil authorities by paying taxes and following laws. When we give to the poor, we honor the Lord and He promises to repay. Proverbs 19:17 says “He who is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will reward him for what he has done.” Generosity is not just giving, it is giving abundantly or joyfully.
Grace – It is through God’s grace that we are able to give and be generous, and that giving is an expression of the grace we have in Christ Jesus.
Stewardship – A steward is one who is entrusted with the assets of the master and is responsible to make wise investments with them. A wise steward understands that the assets he has under his control do not belong to him and should be returned to the master with increase. We are stewards of all the people, possessions, abilities and talents that God has blessed us with.

Generosity brings light into a dark world. It makes people smile and feel good. Generosity also draws us closer to God because it’s when we are most like Him. Giving also reminds us that God owns it all and that He is the one that can give us more or take it all away. Being generous also breaks the bondage of greed and overcomes the love of money.

Here are some simple steps to help you be more generous:

Dedicate everything to God – This includes all your money, time, possessions, strength, abilities, and relationships. Truly acknowledge that God owns it all. That takes a lot of pressure off of us.
Practice living simply – Try to simplify your life. This could mean selling or giving away some of your stuff. It might mean giving up some luxury items so that you can live at or below your income. It may mean saying no to some things in order to say yes to being more generous.
Give as God directs – The goal of generosity is to demonstrate the love of God so that others will be drawn to Him. Start being generous by doing random acts of kindness. You can also start giving to your local church. Consider giving a percentage of your income. Start giving your time by volunteering at your church, in the community or at a non-profit.

So how generous are you? Do you see God as the provider of all wealth? Do you see yourself as a steward of God’s resources? Do you honor God with a generous portion of all His increase in your life? Are you living as frugally as you can so you have more to invest in God?

Generosity is the result of focusing on God’s riches rather than our resources. CS Lewis said this “I do not believe one can settle how much we ought to give. I am afraid the only safe rule is to give more than we can spare.”

Ask God for opportunities to be generous and see what happens.

August 28, 2017August 8, 2022

Why should we give and save more?

Most people want to be generous and help those in need. The reality is most people do not give much. Most people also understand that’s it’s important to save money. The reality is most people don’t save much money either. So what’s the problem? Part of it may be understanding the world better. Also part of it is not having a plan.

Pastor Bob Coy of Calvary Chapel in Ft Lauderdale gave this example of putting the people of the world into perspective. Let’s look at the world as made up of just 100 people:

70 of them don’t know Jesus. 30 do.
30 are white. 70 are some other color.
51 are women, 49 are men.
80 live in substandard housing, meaning they have no electricity, running water, inside plumbing or a roof over their head.
50 are malnourished. Their food is not satisfying, not enough and doesn’t provide proper nutrition.
70 can’t read.
1 is dying as you read this-a little kid under the age of 10. He’s dying because he can’t get enough to eat.
6 have a significant portion of the world’s wealth.
6 live in the United States.
What if you’re the dad of the kid who’s dying of malnourishment? Wouldn’t you be asking one of the 6 wealthy to share a little for your child? Unfortunately, the answer all too often is: there’s other things to do with our money, new things to buy.

Most Americans spend their money this way:

24% on housing
19% on health care
22% on recreation and personal needs
15% for food
17% for transportation
Leaving 3% for other such as giving or saving

Most people want to make a difference but are either too far in debt to be generous or have good intentions but don’t plan in advance to be generous or even to save.

Make it a goal to give 10% and save 10% and live on 80%.

So here are some tips on how you can Save more and Give more:

Save second and Give first. When we give first, then save some we don’t spend money on those unimportant things that we don’t think about. The fancy coffee, the extra soda, the eating out.
Use an automatic transfer at your bank. Transfer money out of your checking account into a savings account after every paycheck. You can also set up automatic giving to your church or non profit either through your bank or through the non profit organization.
Be consistent. If you save money every other week for a year it adds up quickly, same goes for giving. If you give consistently every week and not just when you’re in church you end up being more generous.
You might want to have multiple savings accounts you transfer money into. One should be an emergency account, with 3-6 months worth of expenses, another could be to purchase your next vehicle or other large item and another could be for a down payment on a house.
You might even set up a saving account at a different bank to make it harder to get to and more out of mind. When you don’t see the money in your checking account or in your wallet you won’t spend it.
When you get a raise or a bonus put that money in savings, give some away or pay off debt.
Pray about saving and giving. Ask God to give you wisdom with your finances and guidance on how to spend what He has entrusted to you.
When an opportunity to give comes along if you’ve been saving money you can pull from your savings and give and not have to take money out of your budget.
Plan in advance where you want to give each year. I give to my church first. I recommend 10% of your gross income as a target. Then plan what other non-profits you have a heart for and what you would like to give to them for the year. Then plan to use money from savings or budget to give to things that come up that you would like to support like mission trips, pizza fund raisers, families in need etc.
When you payoff debt add that extra money to your savings and give some away. Or if you are able to save some money on expenses increase you’re giving or your saving.

Being generous feels good and helps make the world a better place. Saving is a healthy practice and helps you to be more generous. Start today by choosing a couple of these tips and put them into practice.

May 26, 2017

A Key to Success

I’d like to share a story with you about two explorers:

Explorers Roald Amundsen and Robert Falcon Scott competed to be the first to lead their teamon an expedition to the South Pole in October 1911. The 1400 mile trip was challenging, and temperatures often reached 20 degrees below zero even during the summer. The terrain was uncertain and unforgiving. The modern communication we rely upon was non-existent. If things went badly, rescue was very unlikely. Amundsen led his explorers to safety and victory, but Scott’s expedition led to defeat. The difference in the leaders’ expeditions was wisdom.

Amundsen spent years rigorously preparing for the journey. He learned how to handle polar conditions, and he lived with Eskimos to learn how they survived, what they wore, and how they moved. He studied every possible scenario. Amundsen designed the entire journey to reduce the likelihood of chance events. He carried enough extra supplies to be able to miss every single supply depot and still go another 100 miles, but Scott risked running low on supplies. Amundsen stored three tons of supplies for five men; Scott had only one ton for 17 men. Amundsen brought four thermometers, but Scott brought only one. Amundsen used sled dogs, based on the wisdom of the Eskimos. Scott used unproven motor sledges and ponies. The sleds failed, and the ponies died. Amundsen was famous for his “20 Mile March” wisdom, having a set distance the team had to travel daily no matter the circumstances. Scott let the weather determine when his team moved. Amundsen trained his body and mind with rigorous discipline, but Scott’s preparation was limited. He made plans based on his own intuition and opinions, not on direct research of the environment he was entering.

On December 15, 1911, Amundsen and his team reached the South Pole. They planted the flag and went right back to work. They reached home base on January 25th, the exact day he planned. Eight months later, a British reconnaissance party found the frozen bodies of Scott and his last two teammates in a snow covered tent just eleven miles short of his supply station. The entire team had perished. Scott’s lack of wisdom led to defeat.

There was a pretty big difference between the two explorers right. Amundsen was much better prepared for the journey than Scott. Why was he more prepared?

He spent years preparing himself and his team – Always remember that to take on something important, something big we have to prepare for it. We have to practice and work on our skills. So whatever we want to do in life start preparing now. We are always preparing for something, when we stop growing and preparing we often miss opportunities or make critical mistakes and failures.
He also learned as much as he could about the South Pole – This is a reminder for all of us to always keep learning and growing. The most successful people in life are the ones that are life-long learners. So just because you are out of school doesn’t mean you stop learning. Keep reading books, keep studying things you are interested in. Keep stretching yourself. There is always something new to learn.
He planned for chance events – He knew that there were lots of things out of his control, like the weather. He had to be flexible when things went wrong. No matter how much you plan there are always things that can go wrong. Life has lots of ups and downs, so we need to prepare for those things by making wise decisions and having some backup plans. Amundson packed extra supplies and took more than he needed in case things did not go as planned. In life things often do not go as planned, so prepare to be flexible.
He talked to people that knew more than he did, the Eskimos – We can also learn a lot from other people that have gone before us that are older or more experienced than us. Ask questions and learn from people that have been doing the things we want to do. Where I work at a church we go to other churches that are bigger than us, more experienced than us and ask them questions and try to learn what is working for them.
He had a system and was disciplined – he planned to go 20 miles every day no matter what. He learned what worked then he stuck with it and followed the plan. Self-discipline is important because we often have to do things we don’t enjoy. To accomplish good things in life we need to work hard, stay focused and stick with it.
Amundson used wisdom to succeed – Wisdom is accurately applying knowledge and clear judgement to life situations

The Bible has a lot to say about wisdom. King Solomon – wrote most of the book of Proverbs. That’s a great place to start in seeking wisdom. If you haven’t read Proverbs start today. Make is a practice to read through the 31 chapters of Proverbs a couple of times a year.

July 6, 2016

The Heart of God

This past week I spent 6 days working with Hope Reigns doing disaster flood relief in West Virginia. This is the third trip I have done with Hope Reigns. They are a division of Eight Days of Hope a non-profit organization that helps communities rebuild after a disaster.

Every morning the volunteers gather and someone shares a message or devotional and we pray together before heading out to the projects. In the evening after we eat together we have a time of worship and a message and more prayer.

On Monday July 4th I shared a devotional with the volunteers in the morning. We had been talking about the heart of God and understanding how amazing his heart is. Here is what I shared:

As I think about the heart of God I have to think about my own heart. My heart is not perfect like God’s, I have stuff in there that is not good. Things like anger, greed, envy, lust and pride just to name a few.

Of course Jesus changed everything when it comes to our spirit and our heart. He made is possible once again to be at one with God. To be reconciled to Him and a part of God’s family. God’s heart is for us and His desire is for all to be reconciled to Him.

When we make the decision to have a relationship with Jesus. When we believe Jesus Christ lived a perfect life, that he took the sins of the world on himself and died on a cross for those sins and then three days later rose from the dead overcoming sin and death, our spirit is changed. We now have a part of God in us, the Holy Spirit resided in us. That is when our hearts start to change.

We begin to see the world differently, we see people differently, we have a new perspective on life. We are no longer slaves to sin because Jesus is now our Master.

Romans 8:26-28 says: “And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will. And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them”

So since we have the Holy Spirit with us and for us and in us, we have a great advantage in life. Over time as we mature in our faith and relationship with Christ. Our heart changes, those things that were in there begin to become less and less and we have more of the Spirit in us. In Galatians Paul describes the fruit of the Spirit and below is a listing of those fruits and a definition, the opposite and the counterfeit.

Be filled by the Spirit:

Love

Definition – To serve a person for their good and intrinsic value, not for what the person brings you.

Opposite – Fear: self-protection and abusing people.

Counterfeit – Selfish affection. Rescuing someone but really rescuing self. Attracted not to a person, but to how this person’s love makes you feel about yourself.

– Joy

Definition – Delight in God and his salvation

Opposite – Hopelessness, despair.

Counterfeit – Happiness that come because of the gift, not the giver. Mood swings based on circumstances.

– Peace

Definition – Confidence and rest in the wisdom and sovereignty of God more than your own.

Opposite – Anxiety and worry

Counterfeit – Indifference, apathy, not caring about something. “I don’t care.”

– Patience

Definition – Ability to take trouble (from others or life) without blowing up. To suffer joyfully.

Opposite – Resentment toward God and others.

Counterfeit – Cynicism. Self-righteousness. “This is too small to be bothered about.”

– Kindness

Definition – Practical kindness with vulnerability out of deep inner security.

Opposite – Envy. Unable to rejoice others joy.

Counterfeit – Manipulative good deeds. “Right hand knowing what left hand is doing.” Self-congratulation and self-righteousness

– Goodness. (Integrity)

Definition – Honesty, transparency. Being the same in one situation as another.

Opposite – Phoniness; hypocrisy.

Counterfeit – Truth without love. “Getting it off the chest” for your sake.

– Faithfulness.

Definition – Loyalty. Courage. To be principle-driven, committed, utterly reliable. True to one’s word.

Opposite – Opportunist. Fair-weather friend.

Counterfeit – Love without truth. Being loyal when you should be willing to confront or challenge.

– gentleness. (humility)

Definition – Self-forgetfulness.

Opposite – Superiority: self-absorbed

Counterfeit – Inferiority: self-absorbed, self-consciousness.

– Self-control

Definition – Ability to choose the important thing over the urgent.

Opposite – A driven, impulsive, uncontrolled person.

Counterfeit – Willpower through pride

So we have the heart of God in us and The Holy Spirit is active every day in our lives. We have everything we need to live life to the fullest and to deal with anything that comes our way.

May 25, 2016

Leadership Nuggets

I recently read through & discussed James Kouzes & Barry Posner’s book called The Truth About Leadership with a group of guys. Here are some of my nuggets I took away from the book:

- Before you can lead others, you have to lead yourself and believe that you can have a positive impact on others.
- Before anyone is going to willingly follow you-or any other leader-he or she wants to know that you are honest, forward-thinking, inspiring and competent.
- If you don’t believe in the messenger, you won’t believe the message.
- You cannot fully commit to something that isn’t important to you-no one can.
- People won’t follow you, or even pay much attention to you, if you don’t have any strong beliefs.
- Spend more time in the future. You have to carve out more time each week to peering into the distance and imagining what might be out there.
- Looking backward can actually enable you to see farther than if you stare straight ahead.
- The best leaders take actions that make people strong and capable. They make people feel that they can do more than they thought they could.
- Often, people just lack a little courage and confidence. They blossom when they have a leader who believes in them and gives them support and encouragement
- Tremendous energy is unleashed when constituents trust you!
- To be a leader you need to make something happen. You need to feel a strong sense of commitment, believing that you can find something in whatever you are doing that is interesting, important, or worthwhile.
- You can’t lose focus when there are lots of distractions all around. You can’t hop from one thing to the next without completing what you started. It’s called grit!
- People are always watching you.
- Learning agility…is the ability to reflect on experience and then engage in new behaviors based on those reflections.
- If you want to be the best leader you can be, you will have to attend to your weaknesses.
- Love enlarges lives. Love creates the desire to serve others and to see them grow and become their best.

I hope you can also learn from some of these quotes. It may be a reminder or a new challenge. We are all leaders to some degree whether at home with our families, at work, at church or in your community. I’ve heard this many times and I believe it that everything rises and falls on leadership. Lead On!

March 31, 2016

Twenty “I Cans” of Success

Twenty “I Cans” of Success

Why should I say I can’t when the Bible says I can do all things though Christ who gives me strength (Phil. 4:13)?
Why should I lack when I know that God shall supply all my needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus (Phil. 4:19)?
What should I fear when the Bible says God has not given me a spirit of fear but of power, love and sound mind (2 Tim 1:7)?
What should I lack faith to fulfill my calling knowing that God has allotted to me a measure of faith (Rom. 12:3)?
Why should I be weak when the Bible says that the Lord is the strength of my life and that I will display strength and take action because I know God (Psa.27:1; Dan. 11:32)?
Why should I allow Satan supremacy over my life when He that is in me is greater than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4)?
Why should I accept defeat when the Bible says that God always leads me in triumph (2 Cor. 2:14)?
Why should I lack wisdom when Christ became wisdom to me from God and God gives wisdom to me generously when I ask Him for it (1 Cor. 1:30; Jas. 1:5)?
Why should I be depressed when I recall to mind God’s loving kindness, compassion and faithfulness and have hope (Lam.3:21-23)?
Why should I worry and fret when I can cast all my anxiety on Christ who cares for me (1 Pet. 5:7)?
Why should I ever be in bondage knowing that there is liberty when the Spirit of the Lord is with me (Gal. 5:1)?
Why should I feel condemned when the Bible says I am not condemned because I am in Christ (rom. 8:1)?
Why should I feel alone when Jesus said He is with me always and He will never leave me nor forsake me (Matt. 28:20; Heb.13:5)?
Why should I feel accursed of that I am the victim of bad luck when the Bible says that Christ redeemed me from the curse of the law that I might receive His Spirit (Gal. 3:13, 14)?
Why should I be discontented when I, like Paul, can learn to be content in all my circumstances (Phil 4:11)?
Why should I feel worthless when Christ became sin on my behalf that I might become the righteousness of God in Him (2 Cor. 5:21)

Why should I have a persecution complex knowing that nobody can be against me when God is for me (Rom 8:31)?
Why should I be confused when God is the author of peace and He gives me knowledge through His indwelling Spirit (1 Cor. 14:33: 2:12)?
Why should I feel like a failure when I am a conqueror in all things though Christ (Rom. 8:37)?
Why should I let the pressure of life bother me when I can take courage knowing that Jesus has overcome the world and its tribulations (John 16:33

December 19, 2015

Lessons Learned This Past Year

As we approach the end of another year I can’t help but reflect on this past year. It was filled with good times, bad times, positive emotions and negative emotions. I cried and I laughed. I opened up and I shut down. I made some good decisions and I made some bad decisions. I got angry and had a negative attitude and I was filled with joy and had a positive attitude. I also learned a lot this past year about leadership, my relationship with God and the baggage that I still tend to carry.

If you’re like me this can describe almost every year. However every year I like to ask myself if I have grown in my faith, character and leadership in this past year. For me it’s a big yes this year. Probably more than many other years because of the amount of change I experienced at work. Here are some of the lessons I learned or went deeper in understanding.

God opposed the proud but supports the humble – Every time I allow pride to creep into my life I get knocked down a few notches. This often happens to me when things are going well and I start comparing myself to others. It can happen when I’m meeting with someone that is going through a hardship and I think I can fix it with three simple steps. Or when I don’t think a certain strategy or decision is the best and my way is better. Or if I don’t pay attention to my wife and just do what I want. I keep learning and understanding more deeply to humble myself and in due time the Lord will lift me up, but it’s his decision not mine. I need to remain faithful, work hard and focus on doing what is right and good and submit to God and other people.
Value your relationships because life can change in an instant – I was reminded through several tragic events that life is precious and things can change very quickly. I was reminded to spend time with the people I love and to work on those relationship by practicing forgiveness, communicating clearly and often and by loving well. The Bible says to love extravagantly and that we are bankrupt without love. Learning to love or how to express love is one of the best things we can do to improve our lives and value the people around us.
Having the hard conversations is a game changer – Conflict is not fun and many people tend to avoid it. However if you want to grow, make progress, change for the better or have less stress, then you must deal directly with conflict. Learning to admit when your wrong and confronting issues quickly when they come up does not allow things to fester and get infected. I had many hard conversations this past year and most of them ended well and improved the relationship or the situation. Resolving conflict is hard but it leads to relational, emotional and physical health.
Vulnerability and openness are strengths not weakness – I studied and read a lot about vulnerability, shame and courage this past year. It takes great courage to be vulnerable and be honest, but when you do it, you experience great freedom, creativity and strength. I became more vulnerable in some of my relationships and took some risks by sharing more of me with others. I grew in confidence and courage by facing the junk in my life head on and sharing that with some trusted people in my life. Everyone knows your not perfect so stop trying to be, take off the mask and be real, that’s when things start to change.
Emotional health is one of the most import things a leader can have – Being healthy emotionally allows you to lead at a high level and take on enormous responsibility. However staying healthy emotionally takes constant work just like staying physically healthy takes constant work. Caring for your soul and understanding your emotions is a sign of maturity and leadership. Sometimes you have to go to a professional counselor in order to break through some of the emotional walls that come up in your life. It’s always worth the time and energy and money to get healthy emotionally.
When you keep God first and submit to Him other things fall into place – My relationship with God has grown and deepened over the years, but this did not just happen, I had to be intentional. I have found that the more time I spend with God the more I can accomplish, the healthier I am and and the lower my stress tends to be. Having a spiritual rhythm in life is vital. What I mean by rhythm is having a thriving prayer life, feeding on God’s word regularly, being silent and being with God and living a life of worship. That is staying focused on the most important thing in life, your relationship with Jesus Christ. When that is growing the rest of life tends to be healthier as well.

Keep growing in Faith, Character and Leadership.

November 25, 2015

Five Leadership Essentials

I first heard this quote from John Maxwell: “Leadership is influence. Nothing more, nothing less.” If you don’t have influence you can’t be a leader. So if you have influence with anyone, you are a leader. If you’re married, a parent, have a job, serve on a committee, play on a team or have friends your a leader. Some people have obvious leadership positions and oversee or lead a large number of people. While others may only have influence with a few people or their immediate family. No matter how many people you have influence with, there are some essential qualities when it comes to leadership and developing increased influence. These essentials will help you at work, at home and in the community, wherever you have influence.

Trust – This is first on my list because without trust you have very little influence. Being a trustworthy person is required to lead well. When trust is broken it takes a long time and a lot of hard work to restore it. When people trust you they will follow you, even when they don’t understand everything. To build trust you must be honest, open and vulnerable with people. If you keep secrets from people close to you or you are not honest about what is going on, people begin to lose trust. In every encounter with people you are either building trust or losing trust.
Humility – This is second for me because this helps develop trust. When you are humble you acknowledge that you don’t know everything and that you have weaknesses. You give credit to people that deserve the credit and you are willing to serve the people around you instead of being served. Humble leaders know they need help from others in order to achieve the vision, whether in a business, church or family. Humility helps you to have the right perspective, while pride can blind you from potential problems.
Love – This may sound strange for an essential of leadership, but it is vital to love other people if you want to have influence. As a leader love is the key ingredient to gain influence. When people know that you care about them as a person they will follow you and go above and beyond for you. People can quickly tell if you care about them or not. The Bible describes love this way: “Love is patient and kind, never jealous, boastful, proud or rude. Love isn’t selfish or quick tempered. It doesn’t keep record of wrongs that others do. Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil. Love is always supportive, loyal, hopeful, and trusting. Love never fails.” When you genuinely love the people you lead your influence skyrockets.
Clarity – The reason this is an essential is because if you are not clear in your communication it leads to misunderstandings and conflict. The ability to clearly communicate expectations, goals, problems to be solved and issues to address is vital to good leadership. People trust and follow leaders that are clear and direct while doing so in a loving, kind way. It is also important to ask questions and try to understand where the other person is coming from or what they are trying to say. So part of clarity is the ability to listen to understand. When you do that you can respond in the right way and avoid unnecessary conflict.
Empathy – This is the last essential that I am listing but it’s equally important in building influence as a leader. The ability to see things from the other person’s viewpoint is essential in order to lead and influence them. To empathize with someone you must slow down, listen well and not jump to conclusions or judgement. It is basically putting yourself in their shoes. Empathy will help you to be more compassionate when you need to be and resolve conflict much quicker. This also helps to build your connection with the people around you because they know you are always willing to hear them out and be there for them when they are going through a struggle.

I could include many other things but these five essential qualities give any leader the foundation needed to increase their influence and therefore their leadership. For me I need to ask God for help in all of these areas. Everyone can improve in these essentials and when you do you become a better person and a better leader.

Lead On!

July 23, 2015

Six Practical Leadership Principles

A lot has been written about leadership, I’ve read books, articles and listened to speakers. There is not one thing that makes a great leader, each person is a bit different in personality, style, gifting and drive. Some leaders are bold and charismatic while others are quiet and reserved. I’ve seen great leaders with each of those traits. So what’s important to know in leadership? As a young person what can be done to grow as a leader?

Here are some things I’ve learned over the years in my experience leading in the banking/accounting world and also in full time ministry:

Be the best version of you – Don’t try to copy another leader’s style or personality. Work at knowing yourself and what your strengths and weaknesses are. Learn from other leaders but be who you are and keep improving who you are. Personal growth should be a high priority if you want to be a great leader. Early in my leadership I would often try to imitate leaders that I admired and would wish I had gifts I did not have. That led to frustration and disappointment. As I got comfortable with who I was, I got better as a leader.
Ask for criticism and feedback – Give the people around you permission to criticize you and give honest feedback about your leadership and the systems, procedures and policies that are in place. Create safe ways for that to happen. Doing that allows people to be open and honest and helps to keep you humble. When I get critical feedback it always motivates me to get better, focus more and make adjustments and ask questions.
Take the time to plan – Most people do not take time to write down their plans and think about how to get there. Developing a life plan that involves personal and business is critical for high level leaders. This means setting aside time to think, study, analyze and dream. It means writing down your plans or your vision for the future and then developing goals on how to get there. It also means putting those goals on your calendar, updating your progress as you go and staying focused. When you spend time planning it’s easier to say no to good things so that you can say yes to the best things. Planning well keeps you focused on the right things, not the urgent things.
Learn to relax – Most leaders have a high drive and love to get things done. However, if you run at full speed too long you can blow a gasket or your whole motor. High level leaders know how to stop, relax and recharge. They understand when they need to take a break, get away and spend time doing something they love doing or simply spending time with family and friends. Taking a sabbath day each week is a great place to start. Don’t wait until you are burned out to relax and recharge, build it into your daily, weekly, monthly and yearly planning. If you don’t deal with stress, the stress will deal with you.
Build healthy relationships – Leadership is all about relationships. To build healthy relationship you have to be healthy yourself. So deal with your junk, go see a counselor or a coach and work on your issues. Then work at deepening the relationships in your life at home and work. When the people around you trust you, know you and understand you, the team will be much more productive. This takes time, patience and lots of hard, honest conversations. Speaking the truth with love leads to healthier relationships. Caring about the people you lead is vital in leadership. If people know that you actually care about them as a person they will follow you wherever you go.
Take Personal Responsibility – This one is huge. Instead of complaining about what is happening ask yourself how you can lead better, what can you contribute to make things better? What part do you need to own? What is under your control? Doing this helps to keep you humble and focused on yourself and not the other person. Coming up with solutions to problems instead of complaining about the problems is what high level leaders do. They own their mistakes, admit when they failed and ask for forgiveness. They don’t make a bunch of excuses or shift the blame. This is a mark of maturity and builds incredible trust and respect.

Learning to lead is really learning about yourself, knowing your blind spots and barriers. Knowing your core fears, weaknesses and scars. When you raise your level of self-awareness you raise your level of leadership. Then if you can surround yourself with people that will be honest with you and are gifted in areas you are not, incredible synergy can start to happen.