Spiritual Growth – Page 6

March 13, 2014

Surprised & Inspired

God has a way of surprising and inspiring us in the most unexpected ways. I am on a weekend retreat for men that run Radical Mentoring Groups. I’ve done three of these groups and love it each time I do a group. I’m meeting up with over 100 other men that are doing these types of groups across the country. We are gathering in Cleveland GA, which is north of Atlanta near the mountains.

When I arrived I discovered that I had some extra time before the retreat started, so I decided to drive up into the mountains and do some sight seeing. I found a park area and decided to do a little hiking. The weather was sunny and near 50 degree’s. For people in GA that’s really cold but for me it was perfect. I was the only one at the park and had the trails to myself.

I decided to do some running and got my heart rate up as I climbed up to an amazing waterfall. I then turned around and headed back another way and found a second waterfall. As I was there I started talking to God and asked him why I was here and had this extra time. Then it hit me hard – God was telling me he loved me! As I stood in the middle of this amazing wooded area I was struck by God’s goodness and was humbled at the gift he gave me of free time to just enjoy his creation and talk with him. The sense of how much he loved me stopped me in my tracks.

I asked him what else he wanted to tell me and I heard some simple things, here they are:

Love your wife and treat her well – You can do better
Mentor and invest more time in the young men you have influence with
Talk to me more often and find time to listen

So that’s the start of this retreat, I can’t wait for the rest of the weekend. I am anticipating that God has something more for me this weekend.

February 12, 2014

Love in Action

I’ve been thinking and studying this idea of love. I have to say that I need to work on this area of my life. I think most people would say they can do a better job of loving others. But for most of us we don’t know what that looks like. I work at a church so what I look to in order to learn and grow is God’s Word. I was reading this today and it really struck me and challenged me. I hope it does the same for you. This is found in Romans 12:9-21 in the New Century Version of the Bible:

9 Your love must be real. Hate what is evil, and hold on to what is good. 10 Love each other like brothers and sisters. Give each other more honor than you want for yourselves. 11 Do not be lazy but work hard, serving the Lord with all your heart. 12 Be joyful because you have hope. Be patient when trouble comes, and pray at all times. 13 Share with God’s people who need help. Bring strangers in need into your homes.

14 Wish good for those who harm you; wish them well and do not curse them. 15 Be happy with those who are happy, and be sad with those who are sad. 16 Live in peace with each other. Do not be proud, but make friends with those who seem unimportant. Do not think how smart you are.

17 If someone does wrong to you, do not pay him back by doing wrong to him. Try to do what everyone thinks is right. 18 Do your best to live in peace with everyone. 19 My friends, do not try to punish others when they wrong you, but wait for God to punish them with his anger. It is written: “I will punish those who do wrong; I will repay them,”[a] says the Lord. 20 But you should do this:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him a drink.
Doing this will be like pouring burning coals on his head.” Proverbs 25:21–22

21 Do not let evil defeat you, but defeat evil by doing good.

Just that first sentence, your love must be real is enough for me today. You can’t fake love.

Love is all about doing and taking action. It’s about how we think about ourselves, others and God. The best way we can worship God is by loving others well.

February 5, 2014

What Grace Does

I’ve been thinking about grace lately. What does it mean to give someone grace? If your a follower of Christ, you’ve heard of God’s grace. Grace is giving someone something that they don’t deserve.

When the grace of God shapes our relationships, we respond to the sin and weakness of others with grace. So here are some questions to consider:

Do you hold people to a higher standard than you hold yourself?
Do you fail to overlook minor offenses?
Do you spend more time catching people doing wrong than doing right?
Are you better at criticizing than encouraging?
Do people feel accepted and loved by you or criticized and judged?
How do you tend to respond to the weaknesses, sins, and failures of those around you?

A grace mindset enables us to serve others out of a heart of compassion, gentleness, patience, kindness and love. The closer we get to people the more these attitudes are needed because the closer we get the more we experience their weaknesses and sins.

When grace is shaping our relationships it means we are ready, willing and able to forgive. Forgiveness starts with a transaction between God and us. It’s talking to him about the offense and entrusting that person and the offense to God. That prepares us for the interaction with the person that hurt us. On our own it is very difficult to truly forgive and let go of the hurt.

Grace also enables us to humbly ask for forgiveness as well. The truth is that we all hurt others from time to time and need to take responsibility for those actions or words. When we ask for forgiveness, we are admitting our responsibility for sin against others, without justification, excuse or blame. Being able to say something like this brings great healing: “I was wrong for saying __________. Please forgive me. I am sorry for the pain I caused you.”

Grace enables us to make peace
Grace enables us to speak the truth
Grace enables us to serve others
Grace enables us to grant forgiveness
Grace enables us to learn to say no
Grace enables us to recognize, develop and use the gifts and abilities God gave us.

Ask God to help you have more grace in your life, it can transform all your relationships and change your circumstances.

December 9, 2013December 9, 2013

Unexpected Words From God

Last week I attended a Night of Worship at the Dover campus of NewPointe Community Church. I am a pastor at one of the other campuses, so it was nice for me to just be a regular guy attending and worshiping. I have to admit I went to see if I could get some ideas on how to make our worship event better the following week. As I got there and walked in I connected with a few people I know, but was pretty anonymous and slipped into a seat about a third of the way up. As the music started I sang, prayed and even raised my hands throughout the evening. I was also critiquing some of what was happening, making note of things I would do differently and things that I liked.

Then God did something unexpected. I don’t remember the exact time during the service or what song we were singing, but I heard God say “Don’t Eat!” I have to admit I was a little startled and confused. I asked God if that was from Him and if I heard him right. I heard it again “Don’t Eat!” That same morning in the church service I sat in on at my campus our senior pastor had mentioned the idea of Fasting as a spiritual discipline. I have fasted before with other people and by myself. I have given up TV, sports, coffee, food, meat and movies. Yet this time was different because God was telling me not to eat.

So I didn’t eat any food for the next three days. Each day I talked to God and when I asked if I could eat I heard “not yet”. During those three days, I was hungry and even felt some hunger pains. Yet each time I thought about being hungry I immediately connected with God and talked to Him. I felt such an inner peace and strength that seemed to get stronger each day. This three day fast reminded me how much I take food for granted. I don’t have to wonder where or when my next meal will come from. I can eat anytime I want and eat anything I want. Yet I am not all that grateful for what I have.

It’s the same way spiritually. God is with us all the time, we can talk to him anytime and ask for anything. Yet too often we take that for granted and only turn to him when things go wrong or we need something. Those three days of eating reminded me that I need God 24/7. That when I am connected to him the temptations are less powerful, the way I respond to things is much better and I make better decisions.

Psalm 63:1 says “God you are my God. I search for you. I thirst for you like someone in a dry, empty land where there is no water.” When I read that I had to admit that I do not pursue God like I would pursue water if I had none. Am I really hungry for God, desperate to know him more and more?

Jesus said this in Mathew 5:6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.”

When push comes to shove, what is most important to me? What takes priority?

God doesn’t need people to evangelize the earth, do missions projects or give away millions of dollars. He looks for people who will worship him in spirit and truth. Not just on Sunday mornings or whenever our day of rest is. God wants people who will worship him in the way they live. God made us to worship and every day we worship something.

When I hunger and thirst for God and seek him with all my heart, I get a glimpse of how much he loves me. As I grow, I understand a little bit better the depth of that love. God’s love for me never changes, yet as I change and grow, I get a clearer perspective of God, the world around me and the people in it.

That all came as a result of hearing two words from God and then obeying him. What would happen if we would listen to God all the time and really trust him with everything? What would happen if we did what he told us to do? What if we would follow his commands and live our lives fully surrendered to him?

On Thursday morning I woke up and knew I could eat again. The granola with Almond milk tasted better than ever before. I was grateful for the food I had in the house and once again my mind turned to God and his provision and care for me. I had a good day with my wife and got some time to rest and relax.

Then on Saturday something happened that I almost missed. It’s easy to just write things off as weird or a coincidence. I was bored and was flipping through the television, looking to escape into a movie or something entertaining before the Buckeyes came on that evening. We all know that there are lots of unwholesome things on television and I can get drawn into movies or shows that have too much sex, violence and bad language in them them. As I was searching, the smoke detector in the room beside be would beep from time to time. I thought that was odd, but dismissed it because I figured it just needed new batteries. I ended up watching a movie that was not the best choice.

I told my wife afterward about the smoke detector and as I was telling her I realized the smoke detector is hard wired and does not use batteries. It has not beeped since then. Then it hit me, was God warning me, trying to get my attention and help me avoid temptations. Then this verse came to my mind in 1 Corinthians 10:13: “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.”

I wish I had that power I felt when I was fasting all the time. If only I had paid closer attention to that warning, I could have fed my mind with something much better. I don’t always turn to God even when he is right in front of me. I guess that is the human side of us, yet God’s love never changes and he sees me as his beloved son even when I miss the way he gives me to escape temptations.

I am excited about what God is doing in me and who he wants me to become. The more I seek him and hunger after him the more he can use me to impact and influence other people. The more I listen and pay attention and then obey what he is telling me the more fruitful my life will become. We are all in process and when we allow God to drive and we trust him amazing things can happen.

November 6, 2013

Feeling Stuck in Your Faith?

One of the promises in the Bible is found in Joshua 1:5 “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Author Graham Cooke talks about this promise in his booklet called Drawing Close: See God’s Face and be Changed Forever. He says this:

“God likes to hide-in fact He invented the game Hide & Seek. In certain seasons, He will reveal Himself to us; in others, He will hide from us. God only hides because He wants to teach us to look for Him. We all want Him to be manifest in our lives, all the time, but God sometimes wants to hide and draw us deeper into his presence. If God is hiding from us-but He also promised never to leave nor forsake us-we can extrapolate one thing: God is hiding in plain sight, teaching us to look for Him in a different way. God is unpredictable but completely consistent. We always know where we are with God because He never changes, but we seldom know what He’s going to do next. Go will push us into places where we are not equipped to be. To survive and flourish there, we have but one choice: Seek God in a place of rest. Let Him carry us forward. God hasn’t called us to do the reasonable, the possible or the attainable. He has called us to do the outrageously impossible.”

That challenged me in a fresh way today as I read it. When God feels distant and we feel alone, we aren’t. He is right there in plain site patiently waiting for us to discover Him in a different way. He is constantly active in our lives, whether He is pushing us into a place we are not equipped to be or patiently waiting for us to open our eyes.

I love the thought that God hides so that we can seek Him and find Him in a fresh way. To me this speaks of being active in my faith. Not staying comfortably inside my box but pushing forward through barriers and obstacles. I love that last line about God not calling us to the reasonable, the possible or the attainable but the outrageously impossible. It’s only then that we can say Only God could have made that happen. Those are the times that we grow the most and our faith is increased.

If you are feeling stuck in your faith maybe it’s time to look for God in a different way. Start praying and asking God to show you that new way and then pay attention and be ready to get out of your box.

July 19, 2013

4 Ways To Growing Your Faith

This week I met with my older brother Brian for lunch. We don’t get to spend much time together anymore so it was nice to meet with him and talk about what is going on in his life. He is facing some big life-changing things like starting his own business, being an empty nester and getting involved in ministry at his church.

As we talked, I could see and hear how much God has been working in his life. He has grown more in the last two months than he had for the last several years. God really has gotten a hold of him and he is following God with all his heart. As I heard him talk about how close he felt to God I got to thinking about how many people aren’t experiencing that kind of relationship with God. Brian includes God in every decision and won’t make a move without hearing from God. He works hard at what he knows he should be doing and waits on God for things he is unsure of.

So here are a few keys I learned from Brian to growing our faith:

Listen – Most people are busy and we run from one thing to the other. We can fill our lives with all kinds of activities that distract us from listening to God. Brian’s new journey started while on vacation away from the distractions of life. Say no to some things so you can slow down and listen more and run less. Maybe its time for a short retreat to listen to God.
Read – Even if your not much of a reader, this is a key to growing spiritually. Most people don’t use much of the brain God gave them. I know I don’t. Reading the Bible and books about God, christian living, relationships and even leadership will stretch your mind and help you to grow. Brian told me he has read more in the last two months than he had in the last 10 years. He said his mind has been opened up and he is able to learn and grow like never before. Make a goal of reading a book of the Bible and another book on faith within the next two months. Reading feeds your mind and is one way to hear from God.
Pray – That may sound simple, yet many of us don’t take the time to pray. When we do its a quick thought or running through a list of items we need help with. What I am talking about is having a real conversation with God. Pouring out your heart and opening yourself up to what God wants to do in you. Start to pray out loud even when you are alone. Brian has gone on prayer walks and spends time throughout the day in conversation with God. Make it a practice to praise and thank God every day, confess anything that needs confessed, pray for people that God brings to your mind. Also pray for God to fill you with the Holy Spirit and for wisdom, courage and strength to do His will. You might even consider fasting and praying. Maybe you should get on your knees or even bow down on your face and pray & listen.
Do – It is great to read, study, learn and pray, yet if you don’t do something you will not change. Brian got involved in his church. He volunteered for the prayer ministry and quickly began leading that ministry. This helped him put into practice what God started in private. He started praying for people and God started using him to impact peoples lives. He did some things that made him uncomfortable and stretched him, and God used it to change him and the people around him. When you listen, read and pray God directs you in what to do. God will give you opportunities to influence other people, serve other people, encourage other people and even heal other people.

Lead On

May 23, 2013

Thoughts on Prayer

I have been reading a couple of books on the subject of prayer. Both are very good, one is an older book originally written in 1937 by Oswald Chambers called “If You Will Ask”. I am reading the 1989 edition. I am also reading a new devotional book by Mark Batterson called “Draw the Circle”. Both have inspired me and challenged me. I find myself praying differently, more often and more boldly. There are so many take-aways I could share, but I want to focus on one part of Chambers book entitled The Submission of Life.

He starts the chapter with this: “We are not built for ourselves, but for God. Not for service for God, but for God. That explains the submission of life.” Submission is one of the most difficult things to do and yet one of the most powerful things we can do. It seems odd that submission is powerful, but with true submission comes peace, unity and rightness with God. Chambers goes on to say this: “God is not concerned about our aims. He does not say, “Do you want to go through this bereavement, this upset?” He allows these things for his purpose. We may say what we like, but God does allow the devil, He does allow sin, He does allow bad men to triumph and tyrants to rule, and these things either make us fiends or they make us saints. It depends entirely on our relationship with God. If we say, “Your will be done,” we get the tremendous consolation of knowing that our Father is working everything according to His own wisdom. If we understand what God is after, we shall be saved from being mean and cynical.”

God isn’t checking in with us to see if his plan is ok. God sees all things and knows all things, therefore he knows what is best and how to work all things for good. When we fully submit to his will we can stop worrying about everything in the world around us and focus on how we are responding to the things in our lives. We can look to what God wants to do in us. Listen to what else Chambers says:

“The things we are going through are either making us sweeter, better, nobler men and women, or they are making us more captious, more insistent on our own way. We are either getting more like our Father in heaven, or we are getting more mean and intensely selfish. How are we behaving ourselves in our circumstances? Do we understand the purpose of our life as never before? God does not exist to answer our prayers, but by our prayers we come to discern the mind of God, and that is declared in John 17:22 “That they may be one just as We are one.” Am I as close to Jesus as that? God will not leave me alone until I am.”

When I read that I said Wow outloud. Prayer is really about getting to know God, becoming more intimate with him and understanding his heart. The more we pray the more we change. God wants to be one with us, but that can only happen if we submit to His will and His ways. The more time spent in prayer the more clear our purpose in life becomes. What would happen if we would start praying for God’s will to be done in our lives, for us to become one with Him and see as He sees and think as He thinks. What would happen if we would do what He says and be obedient to His will. God’s will is that we become one with Him as Jesus was one with Him. To become more like Him in all our ways.

April 25, 2013

How People Change

I have been studying a workbook called “How People Change” by Timothy Lane and Paul David Tripp with a group of people. This is the material we use to prepare mentors for ministry at NewPointe Community Church. The material is great but the conversations we have is even better. We finished up last night and everyone in the group agreed they had grown a lot and experienced a sense of community with the other people.

Here are some quotes that really stood out in this last session:

“God does more than deliver us from the Heat (hardships of life), he delivers us from ourselves so that we can stand up under the heat and not merely survive but bear good fruit. Under the pressure of family difficulty, love can grow. Under the heat of unappreciated sacrifice, perseverance grow. In the middle of suffering, peace and sturdy faith can blossom. In the midst of want, giving can grow where thorns of greed and selfishness once lived. Under the heat of life in a fallen world, new and surprising fruit can and does grow.”

That is some amazing insight. That God does some of the most incredible work in our lives in the midst of the most difficult times. We all face challenges, hardship, struggle and even celebration moments. That is part of life in this world. Keeping God in the center of our lives during these times allows him to work deep within us. Only when our hearts are changed will our behavior and responses change. So if you are in the middle of a great struggle, look inside your own heart and ask God to do a work there.

Here is another great quote: “We all know that sin causes us to be more committed to ourselves than anything else. It causes us to love ourselves more than anything else. Sin makes us self-centered and self-indulgent as we give in to desires of the sinful nature and feed its cravings. Such selfish living destroys relationships and harms people. Our chief problem in relationships is not the fallen world we live in, but the fact that we ourselves are deeply self-centered and have trouble loving one another.”

Wow, that is very convicting. This speaks to the importance of understanding our human nature and how much we need God to transform our hearts. Only when we surrender to God and allow the Holy Spirit to flow inside our hearts can we change all of that. Our relationship suffer when we allow self-centered behavior or thinking to rule.

It is important to remember that Jesus asked us to follow him. He didn’t say follow these rules or go and do these certain things. He said simply follow me no matter where you are at. If you stumble and fall, Jesus waits for us to get up and continue following him. God has provided the Holy Spirit to help us follow him and help us get back up when we fall. If you want to change, it starts in your heart.

March 22, 2013

The Game Changing Relational Skill

Empathy is critical to emotional health. This is the ability to discern emotions in others and then experience, within ourselves, the same emotion. This is much different than sympathy, which is the mental awareness of what another person is going through.

Developing the ability to empathize is important if you want to improve your relationships and get healthy emotionally. Why is it important to be healthy emotionally. Well, I believe that our emotions play a big part in our physical and spiritual health as well. Emotions live inside us and if painful emotions are living inside you they eventually come out in behavior, thoughts and attitude. Unresolved emotions can lead to physical illness and mental damage as well. It also affects your relationship with God.

Emotions should not control us, we should understand and control our emotions. We should not try to shut off our emotions or hide them, that is why empathy is so important. It helps us to connect with and understand other people much better.

To develop empathy we must learn to listen and observe words, sounds and body language. Jesus was amazingly empathetic. He was moved with compassion as he discerned the needs and pain of others. Read Mathew 9:36 and 20:34.

When we can empathize with someone three things will happen:

1. The other person will feel that someone cares for them and is willing to enter into their emotional world.
2. They feel like someone understands them.
3. They feel that it’s ok to be emotional and express emotions, in other words, my emotions are legitimate.

All emotions can be grouped into two categories: Potentially painful and potentially positive. The Bible teaches us how to attune or empathize to these two groups of emotions. In Romans 12:15 it says, “Rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn.”

When someone is sad, we often think it is important to try to cheer them up. That is our natural response, but what is actually most helpful is to be sad with that person. Seems odd, but that is what empathy is. The people around us will feel blessed when we allow and encourage them to express their positive or painful emotions and we either rejoice or mourn with them.

This life skill of empathy is a game-changer for relating to other people. This skill allows you to connect with people in a way that helps them feel safe and valued. They will actually feel better after talking with you than before. It also helps you to better understand why people do what they do.

As a mentor and a pastor this skill has helped me to help other people. When people cannot process their emotions with someone they end up in a downward spiral that leads to destruction of relationships, and their physical well being. It often causes them to feel distant from God as well. To stay healthy emotionally a person must be able to process and express their emotions to God and other people.

As a leader, spouse, parent, boss, employee, sibling or friend, the ability to empathize will improve your relationships and deepen them as well. Learning this skill takes time, effort and patience. Paying attention to the details, asking the right questions and sometimes just being silent and feeling the emotion the other person is feeling. This can be hard work and frustrating at times, but in the long run empathy leads to better emotional health for you and those around you.

December 27, 2012

7 Distractions That Keep Us From Growing

Most of us would agree that there are areas of our lives that are not where we want them to be. It might be a marriage relationship that has deteriorated or maybe a relationship with a son or daughter or parent that is unhealthy. Maybe we are not where we want to be in our professional lives. For some it could be emotional health, hurts from our past that are causing problems in our present lives. Many of us struggle to be where we want to be spiritually as well. So what holds us back from growing in these important areas of our lives? Why do so many people simple remain the same and maintain the status quo instead of growing and changing?

Here are some of the distractions that keep us from growing:

Busyness – Being consumed in a rat-race to keep up and get things done does not allow us the margin to think deeply and focus on the important things. We keep adding things to our lives without stopping other things, so the list just gets bigger and longer.
Comforts – Most people look for and desire comfort and when they find it they become trapped by it. Getting out of our comfort zone becomes more difficult the longer we stay there.
Too Many Options – Today there are so many opportunities to learn and grow and change that we can sometime be confused by the wide range of options and opportunities. When we have too many options, we often choose nothing. This can also lead us to simply be busy because we choose to do too much.
Insecurity – If we don’t really know who we are, how can we know what we are suited to do or where we should go.
The Past – Issues not dealt with will hold us back, and this is often expressed through fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of being misunderstood, fear of being inadequate and hundreds of other fears. These fears pop up every time we experience something that connects us to our past hurts.
Laziness – This is often what keeps us in our comfort zone.
Secret Sin – This dulls our senses and blocks our ability to enjoy healthy emotions and relationships. It keeps us from the vision that God has for our lives and keeps us stuck in darkness and slaves to sin.

One or more of these may be keeping you from growing and making progress in certain areas of your life. In order to move forward it takes a decision to face these things head on by first acknowledging the problem and then developing a plan to make a change.

I love to spend time planning this time of year. It is a great time to evaluate where we are at in all the important areas of our lives. If there is an area we are not happy with, we can begin to focus on how to make a change in that area. It might mean getting help from someone that has been through what you are dealing with or taking a risk to try something new or different. The important thing is to acknowledge that you do not want to remain the same and that you desire to grow. Then start praying and asking God to help make this happen. A year from now will you be the same person you are today or will you be in a new place spiritually, emotionally, physically, relationally and financially?