Character – Page 17 – Chad Stutzman

March 4, 2011December 30, 2013

8 Characteristics of a Growing Christian

As we head into a new year it is good to reflect and plan. One area to reflect on and plan for is your spiritual life.

We are all in process, either growing or declining, and that includes our spiritual life. The power to grow doesn’t come from within us, but from God. On our own, we do not have what it takes to become what God desires for us to become. When we absolutely surrender to God, He empowers us with everything we need to do what He calls us to do. In 2 Peter 1:5-11 we see a ladder to climb that leads to maturity or the process we should be working on. Spiritual growth happens daily, not in a day.

Peter tells us to diligently work on these eight characteristics:

Faith – This is the foundation on which we build and grow. Faith is having confidence and trusting in someone or something. Determining who we put our faith in lays the foundation for our lives.
Virtue – This is about developing a life of strong character and discipline. Another word used in some translations is good. This step is about being a good person, developing your character and integrity.
Knowledge – This is when we start to understand what God thinks and values. This is done by reading, studying and listening to God’s Word.
Self-control – This is the ability to lead ourselves, to have self-control means having restraint with our actions, responses and emotions.
Perseverance – This is the ability to patiently stick to what is right. Hanging in there through the tough, difficult things of life. It’s being patient with the process and trusting that God is at work in us and others.
Godliness – This is a Spirit-filled lifestyle that shines brightly for all to see. Living a holy, righteous life. Not easily offended and not afraid to let others see how we live our lives. This is not putting on a religious mask, but taking that mask off and really living for God. It’s not being perfect, it’s pursuing God even when we are not perfect.
Brotherly Kindness – This is all about living a lifestyle that is warm, relational, and caring. Notice this actually comes after godliness, because this is about how we interact and relate to other people. Deeply caring about people and treating other people well.
Love – This is the highest quality that we can have. It is about sacrificially giving to others. Loving God and others well, deeply and sincerely. In order to love the way God wants us to love we must go through the entire process first. If we try to jump right to love, we will miss what God is trying to do in us and we won’t be able to sustain it.

These actions do not come automatically, they require actual hard work and effort. These are not optional, but a continual part of our everyday lives. We do not work on one master it and move on to the next, we work on them all together. In this process, God enables us to grow in these areas, but He also gives us responsibility along the way to learn and grow. When we agree with God and do our part, that is when life transformation happens.

So as you plan for the new year, include these characteristics in your planning. Which of those areas do you need to most help with? At the end of this next year will you still be in the same place spiritually or will you be more like Christ?

February 24, 2011

We All Got Junk

One of the things I have come to realize is that everyone has some junk in their lives. I am not talking about junk in our closets and storage rooms and garages, although we tend to accumulate junk in those areas as well. What I am talking about is our past. Each of us has a storage unit called our hearts. That is where we put things that have hurt us. That is where emotions get sent that we don’t know how to deal with. We stuff things into this area that was not meant to hold junk. When we do that over time it tends to slowly creep out in every area of our lives. The older we get the more difficult it is to keep our junk in that safe place deep inside us.

What we choose to carry in our hearts can determine whether we take hold of the best life God has planned for us or struggle with the best always being just out of reach. Jesus showed us the way to keep this from happening. No matter what happened to him or around him, he forgave everyone of everything – immediately. When we can do the same, that is when we can live without junk. Just like the feathers that keep a duck from getting wet, forgiveness keeps us from accumulating junk.

First Corinthians 13:5 says that love does not take into account a wrong that has been done to it, or a wrong suffered. When we stuff a wrong we have suffered it may sit there for a while and fester, or we keep picking it up and playing with. Then we try to get other people to pick up our junk by telling them all about it. They can end up adding to our junk by joining in the pity party or the bashing session. Hopefully we can find someone that will point us toward forgiveness and God.

By letting things roll off of us like water off a duck, it allows us to keep going in life without getting stuck in all the junk. It is actually possible to get to a place where nothing offends us. If we decide beforehand, as Jesus did, that we are not going to stuff offenses into our hearts, it allows us to live with great peace. Psalm 119:165 says “Great peace have they who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble.”

When we are easily offended, we cannot have peace, but if we are not easily offended, we can live in great peace. So here are the questions to ponder: Is your heart light or heavy? Peaceful or troubled? Are some of the contents of your heart crowding out the peace and joy that God has for you? This is not an easy process and you may need some help to clean out the junk, but the freedom you experience is worth all the work. Start letting go of yesterday, start working on humility and forgiveness and see what happens.

February 11, 2011

Loving Well Part 2

With Valentines Day just around the corner, love is on most peoples mind right now. Whether married or single, people are born with the need to be loved and to love. If an infant does not receive love through touching and caring they do not develop properly. I believe that does not change as we get older. If we don’t experience unconditional love, we do not develop properly emotionally. We also cannot love other people well if we do not feel loved ourselves.

Unfortunately we live in a broken world, where there is no perfect love. As humans we all fall short in this area of life. We may have our moments, but in the long run all of us struggle to love perfectly. I cannot love my wife on my own, only with the help of God can I love her the way Christ loved the church. In 1 John 4:17-21 we hear a clear message about love:

“God is love. When we take up permanent residence in a life of love, we live in God and God lives in us. This way, love has the run of the house, becomes at home and mature in us, so that we’re free of worry on Judgment Day-our standing in the world is identical with Christ’s. There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear. Since fear is crippling, a fearful life-fear of death, fear of judgment- is one not yet fully formed in love. We, though, are going to love-love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first. If anyone boasts, “I love God,” and goes right on hating his brother or sister, thinking nothing of it, he is a liar. If he won’t love the person he can see, how can he love the God he can’t see? The command we have from Christ is blunt: Loving God includes loving people. You’ve got to love both.”

So God has shown us the way in which to love and has called us to now love other people that way. When God is living in us, His love shines through us. He gives us the strength to love someone that is unlovable. The way in which we love is evidence of our relationship with God.

So what does loving well look like? It is a daily challenge for us to love well. We are tested constantly through difficult people and circumstances. That is why it is so important for us to be growing closer to God each day. I know for me, when I start to let my relationship with God slip, I start to fail many of the love tests that come my way. I tend to have a shorter fuse and be less patient with the people around me.

To read about the way of love click here

Loving well takes a mindset and an attitude of humility and meekness. Most people struggle with the idea of being humble and meek, but listen to what God has to say about those qualities:

“When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.” Proverbs 11:2

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourself. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Philippians 2:3-4

“Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.” Matthew 5:5

It takes great strength and courage to be a man or women of humility and meekness. It is not a sign of weakness but of great strength. To love well a person must be humble and meek. Meek means to be gentle, patient and submissive. Those qualities are rare these days, but in order to love well they are needed. So here are my closing thoughts on Loving Well:

We can’t love other people, without God’s love living in us
Love begins with humility and meekness
Every day we go through love tests, which either increase our capacity to love or decrease our capacity to love, it’s our choice.
Fear cannot co-exist with love
Love is not an emotion, it is a choice and an attitude. It is a way of life.

So here is the challenge – Choose to love well, Choose to love God, Choose to love people.

photo credit: Nina Matthews Photography(find me on FB

February 2, 2011

Get Your Mind Right

While I was working out yesterday, the instructor in the DVD made this statement while I was bent over try to catch my breath: “Get your mind right!”.

I heard a similar message at our staff retreat on Monday. This idea of how powerful your mind is and how much the way we think affects our emotions, our physical well being and our relationships. The Bible says that we were created in God’s image. He is the one that gave us these incredible minds to use, not only to benefit ourselves but to glorify God.

For most of us our minds have been transformed into something other than what God intended. By the early age of six years old many of our basic beliefs are already in place. As we grow there are many lies we begin to believe because of the experiences we go through. Our mind filters each experience and that shapes our worldview.

Of course God knew this would happen in this fallen, evil world. This is not perfect heaven, so there are many lies and deceptions that we fall for. That is why Paul wrote in the book of Romans “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing and perfect will.”

When we get our minds right, our focus sharpens and clears. When our minds are racing, whether worrying about the future unknown or remembering the painful past, our focus is weak and foggy. When our minds are not living in the present, our emotions get out of control and actually begin to control us. When our minds are right, we can hear God better and know what His will is. When our minds are not right, we do not hear God and tend to do our own thing.

When I was working out, my body wanted to stop because I was getting tired. When I focused my mind on the exercise I was doing it gave me the energy I needed to finish and keep up. When we are tired, our mind tends to drift and negative thoughts can easily fill our minds.

So how do we get our minds right?

Examine what you are putting into your mind – Television shows, movies, books, magazines, conversations, music.
Replace harmful input with wholesome material.
Read God’s Word – The truth will set you free!
Pray – talking to God is one of the best ways to get your mind right
Meditate – This has become a popular practice, but the real power comes when you meditate on God’s Word. Emptying your mind can be a dangerous thing to do. Meditation is focused positive thinking – focusing on God brings incredible peace.
Put into practice what God tells you to do – real transformation happens when our mind is right and we then act on that by being obedient to God.
Slow down – we can either slow down on our own, or God will do it for us at some point.
Simplify your life – most people are doing too many things – busy people are not very effective. Say no some things and watch the stress level come way down.

So get your mind right!

January 27, 2011

Love Well

I’ve been reading through the Message Bible this year. I have read the entire Bible in this version and am doing it again because I find myself drawn in by this version of the Bible. It is easy to read and I find myself reading large portions in one sitting. Yesterday I started reading the book of Philippians, but only got through one chapter. A portion of Paul’s prayer for the Philippians really jumped out at me and challenged me. Here it is, Chapter 1 verses 9 & 10:

“So this is my prayer: that your love will flourish and that you will not only love much but well. Learn to love appropriately. You need to use your head and test your feelings so that your love is sincere and intelligent, not sentimental gush.”

I can’t get this idea of loving well out of my mind. Lot’s of questions have run through my mind. How well do I love? How do I love well? What does he mean by love appropriately? Why should I use my head to test my feelings? Love is a word that has been used a lot and it’s meaning has been confused in my opinion. For many people the idea of loving well is somewhat confusing and intimidating. Many of the people I talk too and interact with struggle with this idea of loving well. There are so many struggling, broken relationships today that to love well is almost uncommon.

I don’t have time to go very deep on this thought, but I want to share some ideas I have on how to love well. These ideas may connect with you for your marriage relationship, your parenting relationship, or other relationships you currently are struggling in or are wanting to do better. There is a lot more to loving well, and none of us will ever love perfectly, but all of us can love better.

To love well, we must admit our inadequacy – What I mean by that is none of us know how to make intimate relationships work. We might know some things that work, but we are inadequate on our own to love well all the time. So say it with me, I don’t know what I am doing!

To love well, we must be humble – Pride destroys relationships, humility heals relationships. Humility is the secret of blessing and intimacy. In humility we think about our selves less and those close to us more. In humility we look to serve those around us without expecting anything in return. In humility we realize we need help from God in order to love well.
To love well, we must trust – Without trust no relationship can last. Trust is about always looking and believing the best about a person. Trust can only happen if I know who I am and who I am not. Trust leads to deeper intimacy, and also the potential for deeper hurt. Trust means I will open my heart and not close out people. Trust means never looking back and bringing up the things that are behind me. Trust does not mean I allow people to continue to hurt me or take advantage of me.
To love well, we must forgive – I know of no relationship that last over time that does not have to give and receive forgiveness. As humans we hurt each other, our natural tendency is to be selfish. When we are quick to forgive, we do not allow bitterness and anger the time to take root. If we are slow to forgive emotions come out of us that hurt and damage us and others. Forgiveness allows us to love well for the long haul.
To love well, we must persevere – Loving people is not easy. Patience and persistence are vital to loving well. Love never gives up. Through the most difficult of times we can love well if we have a long-term perspective. Loving the unlovable may seem impossible at times, yet to love well, we must love to the end. As mentioned earlier we can only do this with the power and strength that comes from a relationship with Jesus Christ. He is perfect love and he can give us what we need to love someone for the long haul.
To love well, we must grow – When we stop growing we often stop loving well. Whether it is spiritual growth, emotional growth, intellectual growth or even physical health. When we stop learning, growing and changing our love deteriorates and declines. If I find myself struggling to love the people around me as I should, I start to spend more time with God, I read more, I pray more, I exercise more, I schedule more one-on-one appointments, I talk to my life mentors. Just like a tree, to be healthy and strong it must keep growing. It’s roots go deeper to find more nutrients and water. It’s branches grow thicker to support the additional growth. We need to find ways to have our roots go deeper and our branches grow thicker in order to continue to love well.

I could come up with some more, but this is a great start. How well do you love? What would your spouse say? What would God say?

January 21, 2011

Depression

Christians can be depressed. There I said it, just because we are Christians does not mean we don’t struggle with things like depression and anxiety. Just read some of the Psalms from David in the Bible. “Why art thou cast down, oh my soul?” (Ps. 42:5) “O my God, my soul is cast down within me” (Ps. 42:6). Or even Elijah the great prophet – “O Lord, take away my life” (1Kings 19:4) How about Jonah? “It is better for me to die than to live” (Jonah 4:3). Jesus in Mathew 26:38 said “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even unto death.”

That is some heavy stuff, a depression in which the person almost despaired of life itself. This time of year can be depressing in itself, because of the cold, no sunshine and darkness. So depression has been around for a long time and is not going away anytime soon. I just spoke this week with a man that had been experiencing depression and he was not even aware of how it was affecting him. So how does one deal with depression? For many people seeing a medical doctor is a great first step. Medication can do wonders in helping to think clearly and avoid the extreme lows, but don’t stop there. I want to give some helpful direction for people that struggle with depression from a Biblical viewpoint.

We all have physical, emotional, and spiritual limitations, and we all need to stay within in them. Here are some questions to think about, that may be contributing to depression in your life.

Have you been getting enough sleep? – lack of sleep can contribute to feelings of exhaustion.
Are you eating properly and regularly? – When our bodies are not getting the nutrients it needs like protein, carbohydrates, vegetables, dairy, (Chocolate is not a food group) it can cause physical and emotional problems.
Is your life too busy to get rest and take care of yourself?

So there are some physical things to consider when dealing with depression. We also need to examine how we react to the things around us. The things that happen to us are not as important as the ways in which we respond to those events. Certain responses cause a chain-reaction that can lead to emotional and spiritual depression. Maybe someone disappoints us or treats us badly. Broken relationships tend to be the biggest cause of a improper response. There are three primary reactions that lead to depression according to David Seamands:

Indecision- When a decision needs to be made, do you put it off? Is that your standard way of dealing coping? There is a sense of powerlessness in a depressed person, feeling trapped. Sometimes a person is afraid of saying no because they do not want to hurt another person. Or maybe they are afraid of saying yes and taking responsibility. In any case, indecision often leads to depression.
Anger – one of the best definitions I have heard about depression is “Frozen Rage”. Depression is almost always a result of unresolved anger in a persons life. Unresolved, repressed or improperly expressed anger will lead to depression.
Injustice – Life is not fair and there injustice all around. When that leads to anger and is not resolved, depression is soon to follow.

Here are some helpful ideas on how to deal with depression. This list is not meant to be all inclusive and I always recommend getting checked out by a doctor as well.

Avoid being alone – isolation feeds depression.
Seek help from others – you can’t do this on your own.
Sing! make music – There are some great examples of this in the Old Testament (David & Saul).
Praise and give thanks – Thanks God for the simple things like the bird you saw fly by, the snow in the backyard etc.
Serve/volunteer – When we help someone else, it helps us as well.
Lean heavily on the power of God’s Word – the psalms can be very helpful. Here are some of the most helpful: 6, 13, 18, 23, 25, 27, 31, 32, 34, 37, 38, 39, 40, 42, 43, 46, 51, 55, 57, 62, 63, 69, 71, 73, 77, 84, 86, 90, 91, 94, 95, 103, 104, 107, 110, 116, 118, 121, 123, 124, 130, 138, 139, 141, 142, 143, 146, 147. Take a moment and read them out loud.
Rest in the fact that the Holy Spirit is present – Jesus promised us that the Holy Spirit would be with us always.

Depression is real and always has a root cause. It may take a lot of work and help in order to find that root and heal, but it will be worth the effort. If you are struggling with depression, don’t give up. If you know someone with depression, don’t judge them, love them, pray for them and encourage them. Our enemy would love for Christians to remain stuck in depression, because it keeps us from being effective in his kingdom.

January 14, 2011

Check Your Gauges

Every time I get into my truck, I scan the gauges to make sure they are all OK. I make sure that no warning lights are flashing and that I have enough gas to get where I am going. It has become almost a subconscious thing for me now. I also tend to watch the mileage to make sure I know when I need to get my oil changed or have the engine tuned up.

I know that if I do that I can avoid a lot of car problems in the future. I also notice when one of our vehicles starts making weird noises and get it checked out right away.

How often do we check our own gauges? Did you know that we all have gauges in our life and that if we don’t check them or watch our mileage, or listen for weird noises, we can have some major problems?

God made us with gauges called emotions. When our emotions start to get out of whack it is like the red lights on your dashboard flashing that something is wrong. The check engine light may come on. Our emotions are designed to help us navigate through life. When emotions become negative and are not checked out, it normally leads to a major breakdown. Things like anger, hostility, resentment, bitterness, unforgiveness and self-hatred can lead to physical and mental breakdowns. Studies have shown that unchecked emotions like this can lead to hypertension, coronary artery disease, autoimmune disorders, rheumatoid arthritis and more.

Anxiety can lead to irritable bowel syndrome, panic attacks, heart palpitations and other problems. These negative emotions also tend to deteriorate our relationships as well. When emotions are out of whack, they can cause us to do damage to the important relationships in our lives. So how do you check your gauges and see how you are doing?

Stress is the biggest cause of emotions getting out of whack. It is the same way with your car, the more stress you put on the engine and the tires etc. the quicker the car breaks down. the more stress you put on a vehicle the more care you need to give it. Yet in our own lives the more stress we take on the less time we tend to give to caring for ourselves. So here are some tips on how to check your gauges and take care of yourself:

Check your attitude gauge – Are you mostly negative or positive?
Check your stress level – The highest causes of stress include:

Death of Spouse or loved one
Divorce
Marital separation
Personal injury or illness
Just being married
Work conflict or deadlines
retirement
pregnancy
change of employment
Financial trouble
Trouble with relatives

3. Check your joy gauge – do you experience moments of joy daily or rarely?

4. Check your energy gauge – do you feel tired most of the time or energized?

5. Check your sleep gauge – do you get enough sleep or do you struggle to get enough sleep?

6. Check your patience gauge – are you impatient most of the time or patient?

7. Check your love gauge – do you find it hard to love people or easy?

8. Check your relational gauge – do people like hanging out with you or are they avoiding you?

I could share more gauges, but I think you get the idea. Checking our gauges allows us to do the maintenance we need to do to avoid a major breakdown. Self-care is vital, so make sure you are taking time for yourself in the areas of physical, emotional, relational and spiritual. Some simple things to do might be regular times of reading, exercise, dating your spouse, do something fun, attend church, join a small group, volunteer, give to help someone in need, plan a day just for yourself, go see a counselor or meet with a mentor.

There are many ways to take care of yourself, but the main idea is you have to have a plan for doing it on a regular basis. So check your gauges daily and make sure you are caring for yourself, so that you can care for those around you better.

January 5, 2011

Book Review – Louder Than Words – Andy Stanley

I finished reading a book last week called “Louder than Words” by Andy Stanley. The book is about character. Andy Stanley is a great communicator and writer. I have learned a lot by listening to his messages and reading his books. I read this book with 8 other guys. We all write up a one page report on what we got out of the book. We also include some of the main points and quotes in the book. I thought it would be good to share some of those quotes in my Blog:

Your character is not stagnate, but is either developing or deteriorating
Character is the lubricant that allows our personalities to mesh.
Character deficiencies are at the heart of every divided home or divided church.
Three elements are always present in a healthy relationship: Respect, Trust, Communication.
Our question shouldn’t be Why doesn’t God do something?, but What is God up to, and how can I get in on it.?
His goal is to recreate in you and me the character of Jesus Christ.
When what grieves God no longer grieves you, your heart is hard. When what bothers God doesn’t bother you anymore, your heart is hard.
Christianity is not an event but a process designed with God’s purposes in mind. Being a Christian doesn’t guarantee change. Only a renewed mind does.
Until you deal with your belief system, your behavior will never change. Because what we believe impacts what we do.
Refusing to deal with our past will eventually impact current and future relationships as well.
Unresolved hurt opens the gate of our heart to the destructive forces of anger, resentment, and bitterness
Living in your own strength is like pushing a car instead of driving it.
Character is produced through us; it is not manufactured by us. Our job is not to keep rules. Our job is to walk in the Spirit.
It’s not about committing to something. It’s about depending upon someone. God’s goal is not to control us, or to have us end up in the right place. His goal for us is to have a relationship with us, one in which we depend on Him for the strength to follow through.

I hope some of those quotes resonated with you like they did with me. I hope you will make Christ-like character a high value in 2011.

December 31, 2010

My Top Ten Business and Spiritual Books

I love to read. Reading is one way that I grow and change every year. Maybe you have heard the saying “You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” Every year I am very intentional about planning out some of the books I want to read in the coming year. I don’t always get them all read, but it really helps to have a list. I have started using a website called Goodreads to keep track of the books I am currently reading, the ones I want to read and the ones that I have finished.

I have been meeting with a group of guys that have committed to read one book per month for 10 months. Some of these guys were not readers and this has been a struggle, but they have hung in there and made a solid effort to get through the books. I know it is stretching and changing these guys. They will not be the same after these 10 months.

I hope you will consider increasing your reading. It may be reading one book this year or maybe its reading one per month. Set a realistic goal and then start reading. If you spend a little time each day reading, you can finish nearly any book in a month.

Here is my top ten business book list followed by my top ten spiritual book list:

Tribes: We need you to lead us – by Seth Godin
21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership by John Maxwell
Good to Great by Jim Collins
Becoming a Coaching Leader by Daniel Harkavy
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey
Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking by Malcolm Gladwell
First Break all the Rules: by Marcus Buckingham
The Leadership Challenge by James Kouzes and Barry Posner
The 360 Degree Leader by John Maxwell
The Fred Factor by Mark Sanborn

Spiritual Growth Top Ten:

The Life You’ve Always Wanted by John Ortberg
Crazy Love by Fancis Chan
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
Victory Over Darkness and Bondage Breaker by Neil Anderson
Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis
When Helping Hurts by Steve Corbett
TrueFaced by Bill Thrall
Deadly Emotions by Don Colbert
Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Peter Scazzero
Pursuit of Holiness by Jerry Bridges

There are many more I could add to each list, but these are some of the ones that have influenced me the most over the years. If you want to change in 2011, then make a commitment to read. Schedule it on your calendar if you have to. One last thing, I also read the Bible every year, usually in a different versions. Some of my favorite versions of the Bible are:

The Message by Eugene Peterson
New International Version
Amplified Bible
New Living Translation
The Leadership Bible New King James Version

Leaders are readers!

December 27, 2010

Christian Mentoring

At NewPointe Community Church the way in which we help most people is through mentoring. Whether it is couples looking for help with their marriage, or someone struggling financially or someone struggling with addictions, hangups or broken relationships.

The idea of mentoring has been around for a long time, but it has mostly been associated with children and students and not adults. In the business world there is mentoring of new employee’s, but this is usually not a long-term relationship.

There is a difference between Christian mentoring and the world’s mentoring. Christian mentors do not build a reliance on themselves, but point their mentee’s to God. When we point people to God it puts them in a position to make different choices in their life. Mentoring does not change people or heal broken relationships, only God can do that.

Mentoring takes a longer term view of helping people. Instead of putting a band-aid on the problem, we want to help the person dig down into the problem to see what the root of the problem really is. We also want to help them get closer to God, so that He can bring peace, forgiveness and hope into their life.

God’s leadership is transformational. That is why we do mentoring, to lead people to a transformational, renewed life, the God life. God radically and permanently changes His people from the inside out. God never demands conduct that He does not first empower His followers to achieve. Here are seven things that God does on the inside of us if we allow Him full access to our lives:

He Liberates us – He frees us from our past (guilt)
He lifts us up – He encourages us and gives us hope
He educates us – He gives us wise counsel and direction in life
He fills our gaps – He fills areas where we are weak or lack competence
He motivates us – He gives us a new vision for our purpose in life
He renews us – He helps us do things we could not do on our own
He pushes us – He encourages us to take action, to make a difference.

Mentoring is all about pointing people to God and the possibility of life change. We cannot fix each other, the harder we try to worse it gets. Husbands and wives are not called to fix each other or improve each other, they are called to love each other. The same thing goes for Christians, we are not called to judge other people or fix other people or change other people. We are called to love other people, care for other people, help other people. So let God do what He does best in your own life and the lives of those around you. Just point the way.