Category: Leadership

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On Mission

Proverbs 22:9 says “A generous man will himself be blessed, for he shares his food with the poor.”

Serving & helping others helps us to grow spiritually, improves our relationships and blesses us. If that is true, why don’t we serve others more often? Why aren’t we more generous with our time & resources?

Several years ago I went on a mission trip to Biloxi MS shortly after hurricane Katrina hit. I was with a team of 40 people that worked together for a week to help everyone we could. My main job was to find work for our volunteers to do. I would walk from home to home asking how we could help. I got leads from the local church we were staying at as well. We worked hard everyday until it was too dark to work. Some groups worked into the night. WE got up early ready to make a difference; we cleaned up yards, cut up trees, built fences, repaired walls, floors, roofs, doors and even put up a mailbox. We touched many lives that week, we grew in our faith, developed new relationships and strengthened existing ones. We were exhausted, but we all felt blessed more than we could express. Since then I have gone back several times and even gone to the Middle East on mission trips.

On my way back home from that trip I kept thinking; why do we need to go on a mission trip to help and serve people. What would happen if we took that mentality of helping and serving people in need home with us? Could we take the same attitude of serving we had on that trip and apply it in our homes, neighborhoods, and communities we live in?

Most of us don’t serve others as often as we would like to because we are too busy. We miss opportunities because we are so caught up in our daily schedules and habits. When we stop long enough to go on a mission trip our focus changes. We take our eyes of ourselves and our comfort and put it on other people that are hurting and in need of help. We feel amazing, useful, we feel like our life has meaning & purpose.

What if every day could be like that? What if we all would approach this next week like we were on a mission trip? A trip that would take you to your workplace, your family and friends, your neighborhood, your grocery store, your bank, your church, your small group.

How could you serve the people you come into contact with this week? Maybe it’s just a smile and taking the time to listen to someone. It could be doing a random act of kindness like paying for someone’s meal. Maybe it’s playing longer with your kids or doing the dishes every night. Maybe it’s volunteering at your church. Get creative, look for opportunities to serve people and watch your attitude change. I promise you that the more you serve and volunteer the more you will grow spiritually, the better your relationships will get and the more you will feel blessed.

Serve On!

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Questions

Anytime you are feeling stuck it helps to ask the right questions. Maybe it’s someone else asking you some questions to draw out what is inside you. Maybe it’s asking yourself some questions to reflect on where you are and where you want to go.

For me asking questions has been very helpful in my own growth and also in helping other people grow. I often think about what my next step is in many different areas of my life. It may be my marriage and how I can make improvements in that important relationship. It may be my spiritual growth and relationship with God. I also ask questions about my financial situation and goals and what I can do to improve that area of my life. I also reflect often about my work and what I need to do better as a leader. So whatever area you want to focus on whether personal or work, these questions can help bring some clarity to what your next steps might be.

  1. What is happening in your world? Tell me about it?
  2. What is going well? What is not going well? (This question helps you zero in on the area most important to you right now)
  3. What is really important to you right now?
  4. What obstacles are you facing?
  5. What is success in this area and what is keeping you from success?
  6. What resources are out there that may be helpful to you?
  7. Who can you talk to that may be able to help you?
  8. What is working? What is not working?
  9. What are you learning?
  10. What is your next step? List 2-3 specific things that you can do over the next week to improve your current situation.

When you ask the right questions you can dig down to the root issues and start addressing those, instead of the surface stuff. So if you feel stuck, plateaued, or declining in certain areas of your life, ask your self some of these questions. Or have a trusted friend ask them.

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True Compassion

Compassion has a way of turning peoples heads. The level of compassion to help the people of Haiti has been amazing. In times of crisis most people are willing to step up and try to help make a difference. The efforts in Haiti have been amazing as we continue to hear stories of people giving their time, talents and treasure to help. I am sure we will hear some truly amazing stories in the months ahead.

Jesus said this about the church, “You are the light of the world, a city on a hill cannot be hidden.” Jesus was saying that there is one force in this world that can shed life giving light on a dark and hurting world. Who was in Haiti before this tragedy? Many churches and Christian organizations were there trying to make a difference in peoples lives. The church is made up of people that are called by Jesus to love other people. That love for people is the motivator for churches to reach out and help people. That is why there were people on the ground with the people of Haiti trying to encourage and equip them.

So here is the question, how bright is your light shining. Is your bulb wattage at 25? 40? 60? or 150?

Showing compassion to the world is what we were called to do. We are not called to judge this world, but to love those in this world just like Jesus did. When we show unconditional love to a broken world it gets people’s attention. True compassion is unusual. Acts of compassion are not just giving money, although money is often needed. Compassion is helping people in need through relief, rehabilitation and development. If we never get to developing people, we are not showing true compassion. Relief is often the first step, but the real compassion comes in rehabilitation and development. That takes time and energy to help people become what God intended them to be.

Here are three reasons we should get involved personally in acts of compassion.

  1. When you let your light shine it will change you. True compassion changes you from the inside out.
  2. You change the world one person at a time. Every person matters to God.
  3. It does something to the heart of God, It blesses God when we show true compassion.

Being compassionate requires action. If you just think about helping, cry about a tragedy or talk about how awful something is, you are not compassionate. Compassion happens when something is done to help another person in need. When you do that little extra to show love and respect for a less fortunate person. I hope that everyone that reads this Blog post will pray for God to give them an opportunity to show compassion in a real way this week.

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Listen to Me!

We all know that listening is important but how well do we actually do at listening? The word listen means to make an effort to hear or pay attention, to give heed, or to take advice. The key is making an effort. How much of an effort do you make in your listening to your husband, wife, mom, dad, friends, children, employees, co-workers, customers?

A good listener will usually have these four character traits:

  1. Disciplined when they listen & when they talk – Focus on who they are communicating with.
  2. Seek the truth. They want to know what is right, not who is right.
  3. Love quiet time – no radio, no TV, no reading, no Internet, no interruptions. They review their internal thoughts. They are thinkers
  4. Full of questions. They don’t want to misunderstand or be misunderstood.

Sometimes we think that the people around us hear what we say, only to find out later they thought we meant something else. Listening is not enough, we must hear. Listening is not hearing until we fully understand what the other person is trying to communicate.

Most people hear the words that are being spoken and it goes through their filter and perceptions. Then they interpret what is being said, taking into account, all the non-verbals and the context of the communication. Everything we hear goes through a process of our past hurts, hang-ups and disappointments. We draw our conclusions accordingly. That is why people will take what we are saying and take it personally, or take it as an attack when it was not meant that way.

Proverbs 1:5 says “A wise man will hear and increase learning.” If we are going to be successful in our relationships, we must listen, hear and understand what people are saying. When we do that we are expressing that we value the person communicating.

A good way to make sure we understand someone is to simply ask this type of a question: “Is this what you are trying to tell me?” or “Is this what you mean?” This will help to bring clarity to your discussion and avoid a lot of unnecessary disagreements and conflict.

So here are some questions for you to ponder:

  • Who do you have difficulty hearing?
  • How does it make you feel when someone listens and hears you?
  • Are you misunderstood a lot
  • Do you have conflict because of misunderstanding others?
  • How well are you doing in this area of Listening?

Proverbs says if you are wise, you will make every effort to hear and pay attention when people are communicating with you, so that you can increase your understanding, which leads to better relationships, (at least that is my translation).

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Descriptions of God

I’ve been reading in the book of Proverbs lately. It’s one of my favorite books of the Bible. As I’ve been reading I have noticed a lot of descriptions about God. I thought I would share some of those:

  • God is aware of all that happens
  • God knows the heart of all people
  • God controls all things
  • God is a place of safety
  • God rescues good people from danger
  • God condemns the wicked
  • God delights in our prayers
  • God loves those who obey him
  • God cares for the poor and needy
  • God purifies hearts
  • God hates evil

Knowing that our response to God should be:

  • Give reverence, honor and respect to God
  • Obey God’s Word
  • Please God through our thoughts, attitudes and actions
  • Trust God

Start reading Proverbs today and see what God has for you.

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Keys to Success at Work

Did you know that God is interested in your work and wants you to be highly successful at work? Here are ten practical work habits that will help you advance professionally:

  1. Pray for and develop s strong sense of purpose that energizes what you do.
  2. Be persistent – a new idea must go through 3 stages: resistance, tolerance and embracement.
  3. Learn continually, not only about work skills but yourself as well.
  4. Be decisive – the ability to make wise decisions. Define the problem, Define the expectations of those involved, Determine possible solutions, Take time to think.
  5. Be willing to take risks.
  6. Be “fail” safe by realizing – There is no such thing as failure, and life is a learning experience.
  7. Have a high work ethic. Be on time and give a full day’s work. Go the second mile.
  8. Learn to communicate with both the key decision makers and the people in the trenches.
  9. Believe in and act on making others great.
  10. Focus on what is important, not micro-management. Be willing to release some control. Ask yourself: What are my three strengths? What are my three weaknesses?

These keys to success at work come from the discipleship material I use at NewPointe. I just went over this with one of the guys I am meeting with and thought it was worth sharing. Hope it helps you today at work.

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Are You A Leader?

So what does it take to be a leader. Maybe you don’t even think of yourself as a leader. The truth is that if you influence anyone you are a leader. If your a parent, you are a leader. If you are married you are a leader. If you are in a serious relationship you are a leader. If you have a job you are a leader. If you have friends you are a leader. If you have brothers or sisters you are a leader. If you are dating someone you are a leader.

Basically we are all leader’s, because we all have influence with someone. The question is what kind of influence do you have. Are you a positive leader or a negative leader? Do the people around you benefit from being around you or suffer from being around you? Whether it is at work or at home, you are influencing people.

You can influence people just by the way you go about your daily activities. The people you have influence with are watching you. It could be your children, your spouse, your co-workers, your neighbors or your friends. How you handle conflict, how you talk to people, how well you listen and where you spend your time all have an affect on the people around you.

To be a positive leader, you have to believe the best about the people in your life. The words you use determine a lot about your leadership. If your words tend to encourage and lift up the people around you, people will benefit from your influence. No one likes to be around a negative person, or a person that is always thinking the worst about you.

Since all of us are leader’s to some degree, it helps to be aware of the way you are influencing people. Do your actions, words, habits and priorities help or hinder the people in your life?

Choose today to be a positive leader. To influence the people in your life in a positive way. Choose to believe the best, and watch your influence go up.

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Trust Me

Why is trust such a big deal? When I was in the business world of banking and consulting trust was a key ingredient to client development. When clients felt like they could trust you, they would be more loyal, worry less and take your advice more readily.

It’s the same in any relationship. Take the marriage relationship for example. When both husband and wife trust each other they are more committed to each other, they worry less about what the other is doing while they are not around and they tend to listen better and accept what they hear.

Whether in business , marriage, friendship or any other relationships trust is vital to good health. When you trust someone, there is a comfort or easiness about the relationship. If you don’t trust your friends, you are less likely to open up and share much about what is going on in your life. If you don’t trust your spouse you are going to be skeptical of everything they say or do. If you don’t trust God you will not believe everything He says and hold back from giving him all of you.

So how do you build trust? Henry Cloud made this statement “Where there is a failure in empathy and understanding, trust is not built.” For trust to happen we must listen well. When you listen to someone with the intent of trying to understand them or where they are coming from it builds trust. You do this by being fully present with them, asking questions to clarify and by not prejudging or jumping to conclusions. When you listen with empathy, you are trying to put yourself in their shoes and understand their hearts. When you listen well and someone feels like you understand them, trust is deepened.

Trust is also built by being actively involved in that persons life. When you show that you are actually interested in them as a person it builds a bond. Showing that you value them and want to get to know them will build trust and strengthen the relationship. God demonstrated this quite well, He desires to know us at an intimate level, to always be with us and to care about every single part of our lives. Read Psalm 139.

Trust is also built when we treat others well, no matter what they can or can’t do for us. It is easy to treat people well, when they treat you well. But what about the people that have hurt you or offended you? What about the spouse that has been distant and irritable. When we extend grace, which is unmerited favor, to other people it builds trust and respect. Remember God gives us unbelievable grace.

Trust is also built when we are real with people. When we share that we are not perfect and that we do mess up. When we admit our mistakes and ask for forgiveness. When people see that you are willing to open up and show your weaknesses it builds credibility and trust. The people around you already know your weaknesses and when you mess up. When you admit it, it shows that you are real and not fake. Fake people cannot be trusted.

We also trust people that do what they said they would do. When you walk the talk, so to speak it builds trust. This is an issue of character and integrity. When you make a promise do you follow through or do you drop the ball. When you tell your spouse you will do something do you follow through or do you usually forget. Dependable people build trust and are entrusted with more.

Trust is not something that is just freely given. People don’t usually blindly trust. Trust is earned by our behavior. To build trust we must build the kind of character that the people around us can see on a regular basis. This takes diligent spiritual growth, that shapes you into the man or woman that God created you to be. The benefit of being trustworthy is healthy, happy relationships.

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Leadership Development

I’ve been thinking a lot about leadership development lately. As a leader, I think about how I can grow, learn and improve myself as a leader often. This desire to grow is something that God has put on my heart for quite a few years. Leadership is something that must be constantly growing and changing. The best leaders are never content to stay where they are at, they know that there is much more to learn, there are other people that are doing things better that they can learn from and there is more that can be done to impact the world.

Leadership development is really about the desire to improve. The drive to serve the people around you better, to make a difference and change lives, to improve your organization or your family is what defines a leader. Without the realization that you need to constantly be growing as a leader you won’t change much as a leader, and your influence will not go up. You will soon be passed by and be ineffective. You will hit a lid and not be able to take your organization or your family to the next level.

If you want your business, organization, church, department, workplace, family, marriage or really any important relationship to improve, you need to work on yourself. When you make changes in yourself you can have more influence on the people around you. You must be careful about your motives in all of this as well. If you are wanting to grow as a leader to gain power, position, money, or recognition, then your influence will be short lived. People can see through that quickly and you can lose influence.

Every year I work on a personal growth plan for myself. I think about what areas I struggle in and how I can make improvements there. I look at my areas of strength and how I can get even better in those areas. I think about people I can learn from, books I can read, conferences I can go to or classes I can take.

Currently I am working with a team of people at NewPointe Community Church on a Leadership Experience, this experience will focus on competency based development, working to improve peoples competencies in 7 areas. We came up with these 7 after some extensive surveys and interviews. Our initial target group is people that are leading or have led small groups. These competencies are transferable in helping people improve at work and at home as a leader.

Our goal in this project is to equip men and women to lead better in all areas of their lives. People that go through his experience can increase their influence and help make a difference in their homes and communities. We will be launching a test group in early 2010 and hope to offer this to several groups of 12-15 people later next year. If you want to know more about this leadership development project please contact me at NewPointe Community Church.

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Drinking in the Psalms

This morning I spent some time alone with God. I read the first 30 chapters of Psalm’s in the Message Version. Here are the verses I highlighted:

“Complain if you must, but don’t lash out. Keep your mouth shut, and let your heart do the talking. Build your case before God and wait for his verdict.”

“God’s business is putting things right; he loves getting the lines straight, setting us straight. Once we’re standing tall, we can look him straight in the eye.”

“Walk straight, act right, tell the truth. Don’t hurt your friend, don’t blame your neighbor; despise the despicable. Keep your word even when it costs you, make an honest living, never take a bribe. You’ll never get blacklisted if you live like this.”

“Go ahead, examine me from inside out, surprise me in the middle of the night- you’ll find I’m just what I say I am. My words don’t run loose.”

“I love you, God-You make me strong. God is bedrock under my feet, the castle in which I live, my rescuing knight.”

“Now I’m alert to God’s ways; I don’t take God for granted. Every day I review the ways he works; I try not to miss a trick. I feel put back together, and I’m watching my step. God rewrote the text of my life when I opened the book of my heart to his eyes. The good people taste your goodness, the whole people taste your health, the true people taste your truth, the bad ones can’t figure you out.”

“Every God-direction is road-tested. Everyone who runs toward him Makes it.”

“The revelation of God is whole and pulls our lives together. The signposts of God are clear and point out the right road. The life-maps of God are right, showing the way to joy. The directions of God are plain and easy on the eyes.”

“Clean the slate, God, so we can start the day fresh! Keep me from stupid sins, from thinking I can take over your work”

“He has never let you down, never looked the other way when you were being kicked around. He has never wandered off to do his own thing; he has been right there, listening.”

“My question: What are God-worshipers like? Your answer: Arrows aimed at God’s bull’s-eye.”

“If I keep my eyes on God, I won’t trip over my own feet.”

“God I love living with you; your house glows with your glory. When it’s time for spring cleaning, don’t sweep me out with the quacks and crooks.”

“I’m asking God for one thing, only one thing: To live with him in his house my whole life long. I’ll contemplate his beauty; I’ll study at his feet. That’s the only quiet, secure place in a noisy world.”

“God makes his people strong. God gives his people peace.”

I hope those words were as encouraging to you as they were to me. Get into God’s word, it has incredible power to heal, encourage, guide, bring peace, bring comfort, give courage and save your life.