Category: Character

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Encouragement

Earlier this week I was out running. About half way through my 3.6 mile run, I was getting tired and thought about slowing down. Then I started thinking about if I was actually running in a race. There would be other runners and people watching. There would be people along the side of the road to encourage and maybe give water. Just that thought caused me to pick up the pace.

Then I started thinking about encouragement in general and how important it is in life. A runner is encouraged by people cheering for him. Sports is like that, when you are playing in front of people you tend to try harder. If people are encouraging you instead of discouraging you are more motivated to improve or finish.

What about life? When noone is encouraging you, do you slow down the pace or give up? I think it is easy to do that and we all need a certain amount of encouragement. We need people cheering us on. We also need to be cheering other people on. When was the last time you intentially encouraged someone? Encourage means to give courage to another. Who in your life needs more courage?

When you think about this spiritually, it becomes even more important. As I was running I thought about how God and all of heaven were cheering me on every day. What if you could hear that? Wow, that would be a rush, to hear Paul or Nehemiah say; you can do it Chad! I thought how cool is it that the God of this universe is cheering me on. That He wants what is best for me, and HE is interested in my small little life. Just thinking about that encourages me. If God is for us who can be against us?

I want to encourage you today; you matter and you are important. You are uniquely created for a purpose and God has a special plan for your life. Keep seeking Him with all your heart and keep growing closer to God by being real with Him. God is in control and you can trust Him, because He loves you. It doesn’t matter what you have done in the past, He wants to carry your burden for you, and wants you to be free.

Go and encourage someone today.

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In this World

I started doing some jogging lately and I really enjoy it. I like the idea of getting healthier and maybe even running a 5k or two, but the other thing I enjoy is getting to listen to some of my favorite music, enjoying the great outdoors and listening to God while I run.

This past week I have experienced several things that led me to this entry in my Blog. I listened to a CD from John C. Maxwell called “Success Classics – Part One”. I went to the Free Methodist annual conference in Dalton Ohio at Living Water Free Methodist church. I did some reading, I met with my men’s group and I bought some music on iTunes.

You might wonder what all those things had to do with each other. Well not much except as I was running today God helped me realize that all these events were speaking to me about being in this world and understanding what that means. Sometimes Christians call it secular or worldly stuff. You know, some things are Christian and some things are secular.

Let me explain. John Maxwell was talking about 9 classic books about success. Most of the books he mentioned were rather old, yet they had many great truths in them. Of the 9 books I have only read 2. None of them were Christian books. The one statement that stuck with me was that John said, he is willing to read anything, if he thinks there might be a nugget or two he can take a way. He mentioned the book “The Secret” which has been very popular in the “secular world”. He said that he read it not because it was a classic, but because so many people were reading it, he wanted to see what the author had to say. He went on to say that there were some good things in the book. He also said there were some things that he didn’t think were true and he clarified that. The point was, he was able to read it and take a away some good stuff and throw out the useless stuff, or at least have the discernment to know what is true and what is not.

At the Free Methodist conference on Friday we heard from our new Bishop. He was interesting and tried to be funny and relaxed. It was a nice change from some of the past conferences, but still pretty boring. However, I was able to take a way some good stuff. I am excited about the vision of reaching out to help the poor in our communities even more over the next several years. They also showed a video about a church that was built in a town about 40 years ago. At the same time a grocery store was built in that same town. About every 8-10 years the grocery store made major changes to reach its customers and get them to come to the store. They would change the type of food they offered and changed the look of the store often. The church did not change over those 40 years and eventually was closed. Evidently the church did not want to reach people and get them to come back or even come at all.

I have been reading a book called “What Got You Here, Won’t Get You There” by Marshall Goldsmith. I don’t think he is a Christian, as a matter of fact he mentions some Buddhist stuff he studied. I am learning some good things that are helping me be more efficient at work. I also am reading “secular” fiction books by John Grisham and David Baldacci, both great story tellers.

I also met with my men’s group this morning. We had breakfast together and had a great time laughing and talking. One of the guys is moving to Florida and we said our goodbyes, but we plan on staying in touch. He is now a friend of mine. Some of the guys in the group have really opened up and are sharing the real stuff going on in their lives. It is messy and dirty and not much fun. We are praying for each other and trying to encourage each other. Those guys all know that we care about each other and will be there for each other no matter what. This is a real group of guys that are building lasting friendships.

Lastly, I love music. I have been building my iPod collection. I listen mostly to “secular” music. Even the radio stations I listen to are mostly “secular” 92.5 WDJQ & 98.1 WKDD if anyone cares. Just today I downloaded “3 Doors Down” newest CD and I also bought a couple of “Cold Plays” new songs. Other groups on my iPod are Plain White T’s, OneRepublic, Nickelback, Matchbox Twenty, Maroon 5, Lifehouse, Linkin Park, Goo Goo Dolls, Evanescence, Daughtry, Justin Timberlake, Usher, The Killers, Augustana and The All-American Rejects. Of course I also have some great Christian groups as well.

My point of all this is that I don’t want to isolate myself from the world. I don’t want to be a typical pastor or typical Christian. I don’t want to miss what is real and relevant in this world. I want to know what people are thinking about and listening to. As Christians it is very easy to get into our own little world and talk our talk and walk our walk. We can put on a smiley face and be content with our safe little world. Most of the time we are only vocal about what we are against.

I don’t think that is how Jesus was. He was in the world. He got his hands dirty and met with and listened to the most undesirable people. He understood what people were struggling with and what they needed. This world can be dirty and ugly sometimes, but that what makes it real. That is why we are here.

It seems to me that most non-Christian people don’t think very highly of church and church people. At our church conference the Bishop shared that non Christians or seekers use words like judgemental, hypocritical, boring, out of touch and irrelevant about church and Christians. Wow, if that is how people are seeing us, I can imagine what they then think about Jesus. Why would they want to know more about Him?

I had to ask myself this question. Do I love this world or do I hate this world? I have decided that I love this world, because Jesus loves this world. God loves every person in this world, even if they have tattoos or piercings. He loves the alcoholics and the house wives. He loves the homeless person and the farmers. He loves the CEO and the factory worker. He loves the poor and the rich.

Because that is how Jesus is, I want to be like that. I want to understand what people are dealing with and connecting with. I want to be able to listen to someone and not judge them or think that I am so much better than that person. I am glad I am in this world, because that is right where God wants me. He wants us to get dirty, to get real and to be with people. He wants to use us to reach a lost, dirty, broken world. To do that we need to understand the culture in which we live. We can’t isolate ourselves and hope the people come to us.

That is how the church should be. It should be irresistible and real, the coolest most happening place in the community. It should be a place where everyone feels welcome and not judged. A safe place, a place to heal, to grow, to ask questions, to have fun and celebrate, a place to make lasting friendships, a place to be inspired and to be equipped for whatever God brings their way. In short the church should be the hope of the world.

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Relationships Matter

I just finished reading a great book by a pastor friend of mine, Bruce Hamsher. It is called “Bouquets – Intentional Relationships in Making Disciples”. The idea of the book is that we are an aroma to the people around us. We can either be like a bouquet of flowers or something else that does not smell good.

It was a great read for me because it reminded me how important relationships are. First and foremost our relationship with Jesus needs to keep growing. Bruce talked about baby Christians needing to get fed, but as we grow, we are able to feed ourselves. And as we mature, we can feed others. To mature in our relationship with Jesus Christ, we need to do what He taught. We need to put into action the things we have learned. When you do something it shows that you have learned it and taken it to heart.

Being intentional about investing in people is what God has called us to do. Being aware of those around us that we can be an encouragement to or that we can comfort or that we can pray for.

I hope that I can be a giver of Bouquets to the people around me, how about you?

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Great Conversations

One of the things I love about my job, is that I get to have conversations with a wide variety of people. I get to hear their stories of things that are happening in their lives. Every once in a while I get into what I call “Great conversations”. It is during those conversations that I am inspired, challenged, motivated and encouraged.

This week I had a couple of great conversations. One was with a small group leader in our church. He is very passionate about growing as a leader and has been devouring leadership type books. I gave him a new one by John Maxwell called Leadership Gold. We have been exchanging books and CD’s lately and talking about leadership, relationships and life in general. I think it was a great conversation, because we were talking about real stuff, not just superficial things.

When I finish a great conversation I am energized and ready to go. I hope that after someone talks with me that they are energized as well. All of us have conversations almost every day. How often do you get to talk about things that energize and invigorate you? Which leads me to the question of what does energize and invigorate you? What are you passionate about? If you can’t think of anything, that could be a warning sign that you are stuck.

Last night at the iMarriage class at NewPointe Community Church the instructor talked about stinking thinking. The wrong way we think and how that leads to conflict and problems in our marriages. It is easy to get into the habit of thinking negatively when mostly negative stuff is happening around us. Even when lots of positive things are going on we tend to notice and focus on the negative, especially in our closest relationships. Sometimes we miss the amazing things around us. We miss out on those great conversations or we miss the beautiful scenery God created. What we think about and focus on tends to direct our behavior.

When was the last time you had a great conversation about something meaningful? Often times we miss those opportunities because we don’t take the time or make ourselves available. In that marriage class I am participating inh we ask all the couples to have a marriage staff meeting once per week for 30 minutes to one hour. Unfortunately many couples are too busy to ever have a great conversation. Life gets in the way of intimacy. You can stop that cycle by simply scheduling time together, whether it is your spouse or a friend. If you are intentional in your relationships great conversations can happen.

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BIG GIVE at NewPointe

I am so excited to be a part of the BIG GIVE at NewPointe Community Church. I enjoyed watching Oprah’s Big Give, but this is way better. We are asking our small group network (100 small groups) to go give to their communities. We are giving away 40,000.00 to our small groups to go give. I can’t wait to hear the stories of what these groups came up with and the lives they touched.

I shared this with my small group last night and we prayed about what God would have us do as a group. Each small group can get a gift of 400.00 to go give back. I challenged my group to raise some more money to be able to give even more. We started brainstorming ideas on how we can take the 400.00 and make it grow.

My group has been very generous already. We have given to two families in need. One over Christmas and the other over the past few months. We are hoping we can continue to bless and encourage these two families.

I am also hoping that some groups can go together and pool their resources to take on some larger projects. The impact this has on our surrounding community could be BIG. My prayer is that God is glorified through all of this. If any small group leader’s are looking for ideas, please contact me.

The local church should be known for it’s generosity and love to the community. We are the example of how people view God. If we are not reaching out and making a difference, why should people reach out to God? Why should they think that God cares about them?

The other awesome thing that has happened is that last month NewPointe sent checks out to 11 local school systems. What a great way to build a bridge and develop a relationship with the schools. I am excited about what doors this will open for NewPointe to partner with the schools and impact students and administrations. Instead of complaining about what the schools are doing wrong, we can encourage what they are doing right and find common ground. Then we can help to equip the schools to equip the students. One thing we can do is help develop leaders and build character in the schools systems. This is a great way to partner with schools and build relationships that will matter.

Are you ready to GIVE BIG!

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Leadership Development

My personal life mission statement is “Growing in Faith, Character and Leadership”. I have been using that for almost eight years now. It helps me to stay focused.

This past Friday I was part of a day of leadership development at NewPointe Community Church. It was a live Simulcast from Atlanta GA called ADVANCE. The day was filled with great speakers on various leadership related topics. Since I was helping run the event I did not get to hear all the speakers. The ones I did get to listen to gave me some great insights and nuggets to think about.

I believe we must be constantly growing, if we stop growing we become stagnate and comfortable. To grow takes initiative, effort, focus and time. We need to grow in our personal lives, professional lives and relational lives. My passion is growth. I love to see people growing and changing. It really saddens me when I see someone after a long time and they have not changed. It makes me wonder what opportunities they have missed.

Today I want to talk about growing as a leader. You may not think you are much of a leader, but we are all leaders in some way because we all have influence with someone. If you don’t grow as a leader, your influence with people will not grow and you will not get much accomplished. Leading people is a challenging thing, especially if they are volunteers.

Over the past six years I have been leading in the church environment and have learned a ton. I have learned more what my strengths are and how to maximize those strengths. I have learned that leadership is relationship driven and that it takes a great deal of time to build meaningful relationships. I have learned that I have a lot to learn and a long way to go. I have learned that I need help from others that are further along than I am. I have learned that I need to be held accountable or I get off track. I have learned that when you make a mistake you admit it and apologize and ask for forgiveness. I have learned that I need to say no more often. I have learned to speak up and push back when I do not agree or feel that we are making a mistake. I have learned to keep my mouth shut when I am angry or emotional. I have learned that people will follow a passionate person with a big vision. I have learned that God is in control and I am not.

I could go on but I will stop there. I want to end with some nuggets that I took away from Friday’s ADVANCE Leadership Conference.

“Vision is a mental picture of what could be, fueled by a passion that it should be”. Andy Stanley

“What would go undone if you ceased to exist.” Andy Stanley

“Stop thinking of yourself as a problem solver; think of yourself as a solution finder.” Bill Taylor

“People don’t have to work for you to work with you.” Bill Taylor

“Speak up, never accept the boundaries other people have given you.” Kevin Carroll

“Maximize the day, you have 86,400 seconds in a day, be present.” Kevin Carroll

“Bring your authentic self to people.” Kevin Carroll

“People change for three reasons: Pain, Fear of conscience, Vision.” Dan Cathy

“Going the first mile is what is expected; going the second mile builds a relationship and an emotional connection.” Dan Cathy

“There are things we work for and there are things we wait for. It is a big mistake to wait for something you haven’t worked for.” John Maxwell

“For everything you gain, you give up something.” John Maxwell

“You can easily determine the caliber of people by the amount of opposition it takes to discourage them.” John Maxwell

“People cannot be fulfilled in their work if they are not known. All human beings need to be understood and appreciated for their unique qualities by someone in a position of authority. People who see themselves as invisible, generic, or anonymous cannot love their jobs, no matter what they are doing.” Patrick Lencioni

“Everyone need to know that their job matters to someone. Anyone.” Patrick Lencioni

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Loneliness

I meet with, and talk to a lot of people. Some are married, some are single, some divorced, some separated. I have been hearing a similar theme with many of the people I have been talking to lately. Words like frustration, emptiness and loneliness. As I began to think about this and read about loneliness, I soon discovered that this is a widespread problem in our society.

Loneliness comes in many forms and they all can be very painful. The death of a spouse or close family member can leave you feeling lonely. A separation or a divorce or even a broken engagement can create intense feelings of loneliness. An inability to initiate or maintain healthy relationships as a single person can also create deep loneliness. Even a married person can experience deep loneliness, especially if they are have marriage problems.

Our world today also makes it very easy to be independent and alone which can create feelings of loneliness. We can do most things in the privacy of our homes and seldom have close contact with other people.

So what do you do if you are experiencing this thing called loneliness?

Loneliness started way back when Adam & Eve sinned. They had a perfect environment and a perfect relationship with God. They had no loneliness or fear. After they sinned their relationship with God was broken and they began to experience fear and loneliness. This has continued throughout history and is still a big problem today.

I believe there are three things that can help fight against this feeling of emptiness and loneliness. We talk about these three things a lot where I work (Newpointe Community Church).

The first thing is building intimacy with God. Deepening your relationship with God and living a life of worship is the first step needed to combat loneliness. To become intimate with someone you must spend time with them and get to know their heart. The more you do that with God, the more He fills the void or emptiness you are feeling. As you begin to understand how God sees you and how much He loves you, your needs for acceptance, security and significance are met. Often times as we get off track with God, we become more depressed and lonely. We begin to focus on the problems and feelings instead of spending more time with God. It is easy to get distracted in this area of our lives when we are hurting.

The second thing is to get involved in community. We were created for relationships and often that is missing in our lives. We all crave community, close friendships and a place were people know us. It is very easy to isolate ourselves and not take the step or risk of community. My church is made up of many small groups. People that get together on a regular basis and have fun together, talk together, eat together, pray together and study together. Most people don’t have five close friends, they are lucky to have one. To combat loneliness you need to get involved in community.

The third thing is to have influence in your world. What I mean by that is to serve. When you use your God-given abilities and gifts to help other people it fills some of that emptiness as well. By giving something back to your church, community, neighbors or strangers you get so much more in return.

Using your influence also means sharing your story with other people. The things you have experienced and gone through can often times help someone else make it through a similar experience. Those two things; serving/volunteering and sharing your life story are huge in fighting loneliness.

Loneliness would want you to sit at home and think you have nothing to offer the world. To think that you can’t make a difference and things can’t get any better. Those are lies, the truth is you can make a difference and you do have something to offer. Intimacy with God, Involvement in Community and Influence in your world are all important and needed to overcome loneliness and emptiness.

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Relationships Matter

I did a funeral today and it was different from most of the funerals I normally do. The husband wanted to talk about his wife and share some stories with the family and friends that came.

What was really interesting was he talked for about 30 minutes and most of the time he was talking about relationships. He talked about how family and friends came to visit while she was sick. He talked about a few in particular that stood out to him. One woman that he used to work with, really impacted this couple. This young woman was at the funeral and the husband told a story about how God brought her into their lives because God knew they would need her support. She went to visit his wife several times and was the only one with him when the doctor came to say she had passed away.

This woman was a Christian and was reaching out with compassion to a hurting family. The impact she had will never be fully known until we get to heaven. She was being Jesus to this couple.

It made me think about how important our relationships are and how important it is to care for each other. None of us know how much time we have, so it is so important to cherish and nurture our relationships. You could tell that this man really cared about his wife and he was grateful for all the others that cared about her as well.

We need to keep our eyes open for opportunities to be Jesus to someone like this young woman did with this family. All it took was taking the time to go. She went to visit, she took the time to sit with someone that was hurting. She paid attention. As a result this man is now seeing God a a whole new way. He is much closer to God as a result of this woman investing in their lives.

How many times do we miss an opportunity that God puts in front of us because we are so busy with our own lives. After hearing this man speak I once again understand why we stress being involved in community so much at NewPointe Community Church. Doing life alone is very hard and painful. Having a support system and friends to lean on is an incredible thing.

I can’t emphasize enough how important community is. You need to take a risk and get involved in a small group of some sorts. At the end of your life you will look back and remember the relationships, the people that you spent time with and built friendships with. You will share story after story about the people in your life.

Relationships matter!

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Character

I was talking with some friends of mine this week and heard this great story about character. One of my friends was having his business audited by the IRS. That can be a stressful time especially if you don’t keep good records or are playing in the gray areas.

My friend was not worried because he has a great accountant and he does everything with integrity. The head IRS agent was digging for something as he is supposed to do. My friend would sometimes buy things through the company and then reimburse the company for those items. He does this often with books that he is reading. My friend likes to read and grow as a leader and so is buying lots of resources. He always reimburses the company if it is for his personal use.

Well after running into this several times and not finding anything the auditor was very impressed with how this business is run. He even made the comment that he thinks he will start reading some of the books my friend reads.

That is amazing; that is character. My friend showed great character and integrity in how he runs the company and the finances of the company. Because of that he had an impact on an IRS auditor. Who knows, maybe he will read some of those books and his life will be changed.

A great definition of character is doing what is right even when no one is watching. My friend did the right thing even though he was the leader and could have taken advantage because of owning the business. It really challenged me to examine what I do when no one is looking. If I were to be audited either financially, relationally, spiritually or morally what would they find? Would the auditor be inspired to follow my lead or would he have to write me up?

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NewPointe Story

I met with a friend for breakfast this morning, and he shared a story with me that I had to share. My friend does not come to NewPointe Church, but recently left his church of 20 years and is attending another church. He told me about a couple that were members of his old church for over 30 years. He told me that he can only remember them attending the church a couple of times each year. They were a very nice, well liked couple, but they just rarely went to church and never got involved.

He said he met with them last week. They came into his office and got to talking about church. This couple is now in their 70’s, retired and they have grandchildren. They told my friend that they are attending NewPointe Community Church. My friend was surprised that they would attend a larger church with contemporary music. Their old church did only hymns and had a large pipe organ.

They went on to say how much they love going to church. They enjoy the music and the messages and they are now taking their grandson with them. Their grandson absolutely loves going to church and is upset if they don’t come and get him. Last week they both were not feeling good, but they went and took their grandson to KidStuff, which is between the two services. This couple is excited about Church and God and is growing after 30 years of being a member of a church and going through the motions.

I love hearing stories like that because it let’s me know that NewPointe is reaching a wide variety of people in all stages of life. It let’s me know that we are connecting with people and are helping them grow in their relationship with Jesus Christ.