Panic & Desperation

I read this great quote from Jim Collins the other day:

“When we find ourselves in trouble, when we find ourselves on the cusp of falling, our survival instinct-and our fear-can evoke lurching, reactive behavior absolutely contrary to survival. The very moment when we need to take calm, deliberate action, we run the risk of doing the exact opposite and bringing about the very outcomes we most fear.”

When I read that I said wow. How true that often is. Desperate people tend to do desperate things. When you panic you tend to do things that do even more damage.

Maybe your marriage is slipping away and you begin to panic. You start grasping for anything out there that can “save” your marriage. You run the risk here of pushing the other person further away by trying to control the situation and outcome. The tighter your grip the worse it gets.

This is when you need to loosen your grip and focus on yourself. Face the fears that are causing you to respond and react in unhealthy ways. Get help for yourself, not the other person. If they make that choice as well, great. If not you need to keep working on your rough edges and blind spots. You need to work on becoming the best version of you possible. That means learning to speak the love language of your spouse. Communicating in ways that connect with your spouse. Looking for ways you can serve, respect and love your spouse.

This quote applies in almost all areas of life, whether business or personal. When you are going down, try not to panic and make a quick decision. Get wise counsel, read God’s word, be patient and listen more than you talk. Examine yourself and your motives. Ask yourself tough questions and work on developing a plan of action with specific clear things you can do to improve your situation. If it’s your finances then talk with someone that knows about finances and set some clear achievable goals to start working on.

Don’t allow your fears to paralyze you or cause you to panic. When you face them, with God, you can overcome nearly all obstacles. You will also emerge a stronger healthier person.

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